PataPORN With Chinpoko!!!
Hey everyone! It’s me, Chinpoko! And I’m back with another righteous round-up of sexcellent porn. And this week, there’s dark meat all around… that’s right — vegetarians beware! But the great thing about man-meat is that you can eat as much as you want and never gain a pound. In fact, you’re bound to burn off a few calories, especially if you jerk off to these clips as much as I did.
But enough chewing the fat. Get ready for an extra serving of PATAPORN WITH CHINPOKO!!!
Broke Straight Boys: Bareback Orgy Action 1000th Episode
RATING: 4 OUT OF 5: FULLY ERECT
Thank goodness for Broke Straight Boys — by which I mean actual poor, heterosexual dudes —because without them BSB would never have gotten to a 1,000th episode orgy!
While all the dudes are a little too clean-cut and hairless for my usual liking, what they lack in body hair they make up for in raw sexual pleasure. Each one has a nice dick, some man-bush and a hunger for dicks that gets well-fed.
Seriously, at the height of this intensely hot fivesome, each guy is sucking another guy’s dick while getting sucked himself… and many of the fellas are insanely good at sucking cock. Also, where some orgy scenes can be a confusing mess of faceless dicks and asses, BSB keeps the shots nice and wide so you can see who is doing what to who.
The only downside to the scene is that not all of the participants are as skilled at dick-sucking or fucking as others. Also, I kinda wanted to see everyone fuck and get fucked. But either way, it still marks BSB’s 1000th episode with quite a bang!
HIT THAT – Five lean and sexy guys with big dicks who want to suck and fuck each other? Hell yes!
SKIP THAT – Not all broke straight boys are created equal. Some boys sex better than others, but the orgy remains pretty hot despite the fact.
Raging Stallion: Angelo Marconi and Boomer Banks
RATING: 4 OUT OF 5: FULLY ERECT
I have to give it to the set designers at Raging Stallion — not since The Kings Speech have I seen such a well-designed porn set! The fake hanging carcasses and butchers’ block table really make for a unique and hot scene.
Boomber Banks strokes and wags his curved wong while Angelo Marconi hungrily looks on from behind a side of beef. Before long, the men are sucking face, using their tongues like cows in heat. And oddly enough both men also have the exact same haircut — twinsies!
When Angelo goes down on Boomer, Angelo tries to just suck a few inches, but Boomer’s having none of it. He pushes the back of Angelo’s head onto his thick uncut cock. It’s so large that Angelo gets a bit toothy (OUCH!), but watching him repeatedly gag on it as he goes balls-deep is pretty fuckin’ hot.
Angelo has the perfect butthole: completely hairless, tightly puckered and just the right shade of off-pink as Boomer starts tonguing it. Things get so heated that Angelo offers a helping hand with a finger or two loosening up his man-hole. It’s at this point that we can also see that Angelo is wearing a cock ring — why would a non-versatile bottom wear a cock ring? I guess to keep their cock swollen and extra sensitive? Hmm…
Anyway, Boomer than serves up the meat by sliding his thick 10-inch sausage deep into Angelo’s capable ass. The side-cam provide a great view of just how deep and fast Boomer goes. Plus, it’s nice to see Boomer’s tattooed abs, small bush and cute little ass really slamming his partner.
After a while it’s obvious that Boomer could give a shit about Angelo, as he just starts using Angelo as his fuck toy — pulling all the way out and slamming his cock back in over and over while Angelo moans. Both guys also keep their boots on which got me even harder… PATA PATA PATA!!!
Just before the scene ends we get a rare glimpse of Boomer’s b-hole (which looks pretty tasty too) and then Angelo shoots a load mid-fuck. The two then kiss as Boomer oozes out his own load. Why isn’t our neighbor butcher this friendly?
SIZZLIN’ HOT – The setting, leather boots and deep dicking make this dark meat well worth serving.
FREEZER COLD – The scene is a lean cut of meat, but offers little flavor or spice in terms of variety — it goes the way most top-bottom fuck scenes go.
FREAK OF THE WEEK
William Higgins: Karel Fonda – Karel is hot in an East European gymnast kind of way, but what the hell is he using to jerk off? A “gel bag”?! I swear, it looks like the hot water bottle my mum used to throw under the blankets during cold winter nights. Thankfully, Karel ditches the bag and starts showing us his butthole as the scene goes on. But next time Karel, spring for a proper Fleshjack. Or better yet, get a live-human cocksucker to get you off. We promise it’s infinitely better.
CHINPOKO’S QUICK CUMSHOTS
Cocksure Men: Ian Murphy & Shane Frost Bareback – These lean little piggies swap blowjobs before delivering twin creampies! Dessert is served!
Legend Men: Damian Armani – Are you kidding me?! Furry, muscular and well-hung with blue eyes — this guy is perfect!! I wonder what his ass looks like…
Cocky Boys: Kiss Hug Fuck Love – Justin Matthews, Colby Keller and Duncan Black – Lusty, scruffy hipsters give Colby Keller’s perfect dick the abundant oral love it deserves. Plus there’s tons of kissing which makes it hot, Hot, HOT!
Staxus: Dick Casey’s smokin’ hot ass gets the interracial double-penetration it deserves! – A fourgy starring lean, hairless guys with large dicks — and two of them are EXTRA long. You’ll love how deep and dirty these slutty beauties get.
Well, that should be enough meat to keep you hale and hearty until our next meeting. But if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go start grocery shopping for next week’s porn feast! But until then you should GO OUT THERE AND GET TURNED ON!!
