PORN BATTLE ROYALE: Michael Lucas And Corbin Fisher Vs. Porn Pirates And Unicorn Booty

PORN BATTLE ROYALE: Michael Lucas And Corbin Fisher Vs. Porn Pirates And Unicorn Booty
If you have not been tuning in to this unintentionally hilarious battle, Corbin Fisher has threatened to sue the pants off of everyone who has ever illegally downloaded their porn. When a gay website called Unicorn Booty expressed concerned that Corbin Fisher’s crusade could potentially out closeted gay teens the instant their parents get a legal notice for stealing “Jarrett Fucks Connor” and then try and commit suicide.
In response, Corbin Fisher’s lawyer e-mailed Unicorn Booty calling the hypothetical teenage porn pirates “thieving little shits” and saying that a resulting suicide is unlikely. Unicorn Booty’s editor then responded by posting a video of himself talking about how he attempted suicide when his parents discovered his gay porn stash.
Then the editor of The Sword weighed into the battle doubting Unicorn Booty’s story and basically saying that any closeted kid who keeps evidence of his gayness lying around risks being outed, that porn theft is wrong no matter who is doing it, and that blaming Corbin Fisher for hypothetical suicides is an illogical histrionic overreaction to a legitimate legal action.
Well now the Empress of NYC Porn, Michael Lucas has thrown in her two cents. Read what Her Majesty has to say after the jump!

I’ve read about the outrage against Corbin Fisher for suing pirates on several gay blogs (some with ridiculous captions like “Corbin Fisher wants your cash”). Corbin Fisher has used rather harsh language to refer to the teenagers who are stealing, but let’s move from tone to substance and take the argument from there. I couldn’t agree more with the main point. We should prosecute thieves mercilessly. We should not and will not discriminate based on age when it comes to piracy.

A crime is a crime, and theft is a crime. There is no difference between stealing movies online and shoplifting.

Connecting that push for justice with teen suicide is a ridiculous, disgusting, bogus claim made solely to stir up hysteria. First of all, we don’t sue pirates right away. We start out by trying to negotiate a reasonable settlement. And in hundreds of negotiations, we have, so far, not come across a single teenager. But were that to happen, we will prosecute as always. We are not going to discriminate because of age.

But the real issue here is not our efforts to protect our property. The real issue is that piracy sites are in fact wide open to underage users. Legitimate adult sites age verify their users — piracy sites do nothing of the sort. And thereby they violate yet another set of federal laws. I really think piracy sites have a moral and a legal responsibility to keep underage users away from their material —and that would be the correct way to deal with the whole question of catching underage porn thieves.

Having said that, make no mistake. Both the music and movie industries (mainstream and adult) will go after those sites and take action accordingly.

And dear Unicorn Booty: don’t trick your readers with false naivete. Corbin Fisher doesn’t “want your cash.” The studio just wants to protect the entertainment business. Otherwise there will be nothing left to steal.

Corbin Fisher is handling this entire issue with all the grace and expertise of a crippled pro-wrestler with Tourette’s syndrome. Step one: have a PR department that prevents your lawyers from calling teenagers “thieving little shits.” Step two: develop a consistent message that says, we don’t want to hurt anyone, we just want to protect our product so we can continue making quality porn. Step three: if you wanna buy into the whole suicide thing consider a “Don’t kill yourself over gay porn” promotion that highlights new affordable membership rates for closeted teens.
That way Corbin Fisher gets their money, closeted teens get their rocks off, and we get to write about sexier issues in gay porn besides proprietary copyright infringement. Cripes, it kills our boners just saying it.

Mar 02, 2011 By paperbagwriter 19 Comments

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