End of discussion: Theory of Evolution proved by one photo!

Yes, this proof just in… we did evolve from the apes!

Conservative types received the primitive monkey brain, unable to formulate complex thoughts. And queers got the drive and talent for all things sexual. (Well, not ALL things sexual. Some of us here have never driven a Vulva… and you won’t see us out test-driving one anytime soon.)

Pre-Happy-Monday Greetings to all! Have a spooky week. 🙂

Click Click!!

As you requested… MORE SAILORS…

We aim to please… actually, our masters aim to please YOU… so they made the whole “funnies” (aka CRaP) department come in and work on the weekend. You requested more of the sailors from our recent Halloween post, so here you go!

We’re not bitter. We know our caste, our lot, our bottom-layered-ness in the world. Happy to oblige. But now we’re taking a serious nap. K? 🙂

As they say in Germany… Klicken Klicken!!

And the WINNERS are… (we had a tie)…

We had a tie this week. The two First Place winners in CAPTION THIS are… drum roll… “awwyea” and “dj”… as you can see from the graphic. Good work!

We’ll probably say something like this every time, because it’s true: You people should seriously go into comedy. Please don’t feel too badly if you don’t win because the competition is always pretty stiff (just the way we like it!).

Here are some “runner up / honorable mention” entries that were in the finals (in no particular order):

Rob submitted two that were very similar, so we treated them as one entry: “Oh man! You got soooo ripped off. The guys at Queer Click did SUCH a better job when they used the x-ray machine on Superman!”… and … “Man, I see you got the boots right… but what about the belt and cape man? There is no way anyone will ever figure out that you are Queer Clicks Superman this Halloween.” The lesson here: It doesn’t hurt to pander to our Queer Click-ness and tie in a previous posting… we fall for it every time.

Hank got credit for lyricism (try spelling that without looking it up): “It’z a teeny weenie, pinky winkie, it’zie bitzy, balzlez peeny….”.

And Will gets a nod for creative use of current events: “Did Lyndie England see this one?” (For those of you who don’t read more than porn, Lyndie was the US soldier that got into trouble when she posed in a similar manner… and others… with naked Iraqi prisoners.)

So there you have it. Thanks for your entries!! See you again soon for another game of QC’s ever-popular feature CAPTION THIS!

Click Click!!

Dear Husband

Dear Husband
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.
These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn’t notice that I had gotten my hair and nails
done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game.
You don’t tell me you love me anymore, you don’t touch me or anything. Either you’re cheating or you don’t love meanymore, what ever the case is, I’m gone.
P.S.
If you’re trying to find me, don’t.Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together!
Have a great life.
Your EX-Wife.

Dear Ex-Wife
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn’t work.
I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was “You look just like a man!” My mother raised me to not say anything if you can’t say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was$49.99.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that’s not a problem.
Signed Rich As Hell and Free!