Lucas Entertainment and Apple Create New Way To Masturbate In Public

Apple CEO Steve Jobs has proudly touted that his iPad will offer “freedom from porn” by offering no sexy applications in the Apple app store. But apps be darned because Lucas Entertainment CEO Michael Lucas has found a way to slip some hot sausage action into Mr. Jobs’ back door—by offering their porn content in an iPad friendly format.
Lucas said, “On the iPad, our website delivers the full screen convenience of getting off wherever you are because you never know when the mood will strike: on an airplane, at the beach, during family visits. Everyone needs a porn break.” Yes, whether you’re in a crowded airplane, a public beach, or sitting next to your grandmother at brunch, there’s no better time to whip out your cock and start beating off to Urine Fist Fest, Men in Stockings, or FARTS.
Publicly watching porn when you should be working, playing in the ocean, or helping grandma “let go” is creepy at best and illegal at worst. But as long as you excuse yourself to go and “read for a while in the bathroom”, the Lucas-iPad connection should make discreet wanking off easier than ever. Just remember to aim away from the screen.