Ask QC: Should Gay Brothers ‘Come Out’ at The Same Time?

Hi there QC,

A few weeks ago there was a question on here about when Is the ‘right’ age/time to ‘come out’?

Well I have the same situation but its double the problem – my brother (who is 17 months older than me) is also gay and we recently came out to each other (he’s nearly 20 and I’m 18). Although I already knew he was gay, he said he had no idea about me and didn’t believe me at first when I told him! LOL!

The thing is, we both still live at home with Mom and Dad, 3 brothers and 2 sisters (all younger than us) and although we’re not too sure about coming out to them all just yet, we really do want to come out to our parents.
Our question is, should we both come out at the same time to our parents and with both parents present? I think we should but my brother thinks it will be too much them to take and he wants to test the water first and come out to them by himself first – then if its OK then I should do so at a later date. I’m not really convinced that’s the right thing to do and really think we should both do it together. So if you have any ideas or advice on how we should do it then that would be really great!

Thanks for your help guys!

J + D

Making that decision to come out is a big step so lets see if we can help these two boys!, whilst every circumstance is different, and your situation is a double whammy, lets hope that some of our readers have experienced a similar set of circumstances and will be able to guide you. So, if you think you can help J + D with their dilemma and answer any of their questions and more, or have any other advice to offer them, then please leave your opinions, experiences, and advice in the QComments section.
Need advice? Just send in your questions and the QCollective will get you some answers!