Ask QC: I still love him, but I just don’t like sex with him anymore.

Hi Ask QC,

I know this might sound a bit weird, so I’m not sure if anyone can help with this problem!

I love my boyfriend, love him to bits really I do. We’ve been living together for 2 years, but dated for a year before that. We’ve actually known each other for nearly 7 years and I do really feel like he’s my other half and my life long pal. We’re both 28, working hard and long hours and noticed that around 6 months ago I started to go off having sex.

I love to kiss and cuddle with him, but I really don’t like to have sex with him at all. Which is a problem for him rather than me – he says he needs it at least a few times a week or he gets frustrated. But for me, I just feel like I would be going through the motions of having sex just to please him, I know that sounds selfish of me but I just don’t feel the need for sex, or anything when we do it.

I know that this is causing a rift between us, which I obviously don’t want but other than I just bend over and spread my legs for him, I can’t seem to think of a realistic solution to this.

My friends have suggested that we have an open relationship, but I’m a bit reluctant to do that – I know that I’m an extremely jealous personality. They’ve also suggested that we split up as a couple and just remain friends, but that seems like giving up too easily, especially as we get along so well in everything else in our lives together.

If you’ve got any ideas what to do then we could at least give those a try before we throw the towel in. I do really love him but just don’t know how to like sex with him.

Thanks for your help guys,

Harrison

Hi Harrison and thanks for writing in with your questions and concerns. Reaching out for help and advice will give you some more ideas and options to handle your difficult situation and hopefully find a remedy. There should be some readers here who have felt the same way during different times in their lives too, so, dear QC readers, what tips and advice can you give Harrison? Have you been in this situation with your partner before? What did you both do to overcome this? If you can help in any way, then please share your wisdom and advice for all in the QComments section!
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