Ask QC at QCommunity: Accidental Pooping

Ask QC at QCommunity is the dedicated place for all our QueerClickers to connect, support and share their wisdom. You can start a new discussion, join a thread or browse through the hundreds of posts archived there to share your concerns, issues and advice. And we’ve made it easy for all to join in – no fuss, no new accounts, just log in with your regular Disqus account that you’re already using here. This week briandt asks about:

ACCIDENTIAL POOPING

I’ve been with my partner for 5 years. We met in college and moved in together after graduation. We are both versatile and had a great sex life until 5 months ago. While my partner was bottoming for me he accidentally pooped. He had no idea that it was going to happen. I actually could feel it hit the tip of my dick but I didn’t know what to do. I thought it might just stay in there so I kept going. Then I came and after I pulled my dick out of him and the poop came out of him at the same moment. It wasn’t all that big a deal to me. It was just one poop log. It wasn’t like it was some big mess. I got up to get tissues to pick up the poop but he took them from me and picked it up himself and flushed it. My partner was terribly embarrassed told me to shower first like I was bothered by his poop touching my dick. We didn’t even talk about it. I said it was no big deal but he didn’t answer me.

We still haven’t talked about it. It’s kind of like we haven’t talked about sex all. He stopped initiating sex. When I initiate it there are only certain things he’ll do. He’ll rim me, blow me and fuck me but I can only blow him and get fucked by him. Since the incident he has refused to let me rim him or bottom for me.

I’m pretty confused about his reaction. Nothing like this has ever happened to either one of us in our lives. We no longer use condoms and we’ve never even had the slightest bit of poop on our dicks. We haven’t had many partners before each other so our sex lives previous to each other has been limited so I’m not sure how common something like this can be. I miss him bottoming for me and I really miss rimming him since it’s one of my favorite things to do. I mean, so what, he pooped. He cleaned out before sex so it’s not like he was careless or anything, it was simply an accident. It doesn’t gross me out at all – this is the man I love and intend to spend my life with and, quite frankly, his poop doesn’t gross me out at all. It’s not like I’m into scat but I also don’t find his poop gross. So, where do I go from here? How do I get our sex life back on track? How can I help him to deal with his horror over this incident? I sincerely appreciate any help.

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