Madonna Is With Child!

Madonna is with child! No.. she’s not preggers. Her Royal Madgesty, Madonna just wrapped up her South American leg of her “Sweet and Sticky” tour by picking up a piece of 21-year-old Protuguese man-candy named Jesus Luz. Geez, Madge… cougar much? It’s great that she’s found someone hotter than guns-n-goons ex-hubby Guy Ritchie and baseball beef head Alex Rodriguez (aka , A-Rod), but Jesus has got to be a third her age.
We all know that Madonna made a deal with the devil long ago to make her an ageless pop-star, but the the cracks are starting to show. Now she’s repenting by letting Jesus inside her. She’d better ride the crazy wiener train for all it’s worth before it’s shaws, walkers, and adult diapers for the Cone Bra Queen. Who knows? Madge’s a big hit with the gays. Maybe she’s not fucking Jesus at all… maybe he’s just an ultra-groupie. Of course, that’s probably just wishful thinking seeing as we’d rather be porking the hot young thing.
Read more at: D-Listed, Jossip, Made in Brazil (again and again and again and again), Me-me-me TV, Pink is the New Blog (again), Queerty, The Superficial, Towleroad, and Trey Cruz (again).