Big Cock, Only 5 Pounds… Cheap!

Just because Christmas is over doesn’t mean that you have to stop wasting money giving people useless gifts. Do you ever suffer from “shrinkage”? Do you ever wish that people could see your dick through your pants like they did in middle school? OF COURSE YOU DO (liar). That’s why there’s the Trouser Expander.
“With its handy hidden pump you can inflate the trouser expander to give you a more eye catching… well you get the idea!
Great for those cold water ‘shrinkage’ moments, for impressing the ladies, or for those who have been teased in the locker room a little to much for their own self esteem!
All you need to do is inflate the pouch using the handy rubber pump for some impressive enlargements – with no surgery, pain or bogus medications!
Enlarge yourself to a whopping 8″, with a girth beyond belief!”
First off, an inflated bag feels a hell of a lot different than a stiff cock bulging in a man’s pants. Second off, where the hell are you supposed to carry that “handy hidden pump”? It’s the size of a lemon! Third off, how the hell do you discretely deflate it? Do you have to go in the gay bar bathroom and deflate you cock in the toilet stall with the glory hole?
Save your £4.95 and buy a drink for your low self-etseem or flirt with a big dick that you can take home and really enjoy. But for discerning frat boy consumers, the site selling this piece of crap also has a Willy Care Kit, Love Muscle Toner, and Gentleman’s Ball Scratcher. Ahh… the joys of capitalism!