New Dutch Video Teaches You How To Make Homemade Sex Machines

Remember the dildo chair from the Coen brothers’ film Burn After Reading? Apparently Holland artists Lernert Engelberts and Sander Plug do and they’ve built a bunch of other dirty contraptions to play to De Jeugd Van Tegenwoordig’s Elektrotechnique. Forget the dildo chair! They’ve got machines for spanking, stomping, some hot umbrella action, and something ambitious involving a watermelon. No it’s not like when FratMen’s Spencer fucked a pumpkin. Just watch and see.
Which reminds us, if you’ve ever used a machine for sex (whether it be a battery-operated dildo, a cellular phone for dirty talk, or a DVD player for porn… you’ve had sex with machines. It’s a slippery slope to having sex with robots, our friends. Didn’t you know they’re even teaching how to use sexual power tools in America’s leading universities? We’ll see you in the cyber dungeon, mate.