Ask QC: I Don’t Fit In

Hey QC,

I hope you don’t think this is a lame problem but I’m really worried that I don’t fit in with the gay scene and because of that I can’t find a boyfriend. I keep comparing myself with all these other guys that are on the scene and they’re all better looking, slimmer, fitter and cuter.

Its really getting me down because I’m not like them and when I go to gay bars and clubs no one ever seems interested in me. The few times anyone has ever chatted to me they were much older (I’m 18) and obviously only after sex. And when I made it clear I’m not just going to have sex with a random I just met then they moved on to someone else.

I found the whole process demoralizing as it took me so much courage to build up just to go into those places then just ended up going home alone. I think I’ve realized that I’m not the sporty, clubbing or bar hopping type, I’m more the studious type and a bit shy and introspective. I just don’t identify with a group of shrieking guys and I don’t even like the music they’re playing in those places. Don’t get me wrong there is nothing wrong with the effeminate type of guy, but that’s not the sort I am attracted to, what are the chances of me finding other gay guys my age who are just normal and not into the scene?

Thx
Blane

Well its always difficult taking that first step out into the big gay world. How was it for you, dear QC readers and what advice would you give Blane? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section.
Have a question for QC? Send ’em to [email protected] and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!