QCA Comedy Quickie: Match.com Wants You To Find Someone Special This Christmas

Christmas can be a lonely time of year, especially if you don’t have someone special to roast your chestnuts on an open fire. But Match.com wants to remind you that the right guy is just waiting for you. Like this gentleman above. He’s handsome, expressive, and honest. And even though he mentions titties, we’re not so sure that he’s straight. For one thing, that lisp. For another, who wants to put their dick in “all up in your guts” and “spray your tubes”? In fact, he seems less like any gay guy we’ve ever met and more like a horned up cock hound ready to fuck whatever comes along next, whether it’s you or a stray animal—cocaine is a powerful drug.