Zack Randall Falls Back In Love With Yawn Worthy Queen Beast

Rumors circling around the gay porn blogosphere suggested that 2009 Freshman of the Year Zack Randall had broken up with a certain QC-hating drama queen. According to The Sword, “The formerly estranged couple broke up last year, dissolved their joint website, and moved to separate international locales… After a seven month hiatus, [however] Zack returned to his Twitter last night” to make a declaration of love. We have edited the tweet to avoid giving undue publicity to Her Travesty.
How has Zack fallen for such a rancid piece of love meat? The only possible answer is that SHE-BEAST 3000 used her insaniac hypno-ray on Mr. Randall to get him to fall back in love with the light eater. Or maybe Lady Darkshade psy-hacked into Zack’s brain, got him to log into his Twitter account, and then used the beautiful uncut stud like a marionette to write a declaration of love so unbelievable that gay porn blogs would have no choice but to cover it.
THOSE ARE THE ONLY TWO BELIEVABLE SCENARIOS. Otherwise, it is the sad possibility that during their breakup Zack simply got driven out of his mind by the scores of sane, hot, available men waiting to make his every waking moment a sea of unending bliss. Their endless advances were far too much to fathom and so Zack decided to stick his dick in a blender again. It makes us super cyber sad.
We love you Zack. Please make better life choices.