Ask QC: I Want an LTR and Not Just a Sex Date… Help!

Okay. So here is my problem…it not exactly sexual, so it isn’t going to be something that’s traditionally answered on here. But I figure what the hell, put things out in the universe and see what comes back.

I cannot seem to get a guy to date…rather than just fuck. It’s annoying. I prefer companionship and LTR over casual sex. In fact, so much so, I’m not comfortable performing sexually with strangers. I’m a shy guy, with tendencies for staying away from guys who are intimidating…mostly the men that I find attractive. I want friendships that progress to something naturally. I don’t like to rush into anything quickly. I take my time, and want to get to know someone first.

The only outlet I have sexually is porn. Which is somewhat sad, since it isn’t doing the trick anymore. Usually, my sexual fantasies revolve around romantic interests. My fantasies are not compatible with gay porn, in general.

I want to find companionship, but lack the necessary skills or good spaces to meet the right type of guys…

In other words, where are the good men at?

I don’t want to cruise clubs or bars for various reasons. Basically, those places you won’t find your dating types…its mostly about getting laid. Not like there is anything wrong with that, but it isn’t my scene (if you are wondering, YES, I’M GAY!)

I’ve tried some dating sites online, but the guys are not plentiful in the areas I’m at. And the ones that are very pushy and aggressive… one was asking me for commitment before we’d even met…so I politely turned him down.

I want the normal dating life that some straights seem to have, that gays lack. Any creative ideas on how to do this? I know of gay interest groups. But I’m not a biker, nor do I like religion; So that puts me at a disadvantage.

Signed,

Boo Hoo, I’m sooo alone!

With love in the air can we help Boo Hoo? Where or how would you suggest he finds his ideal date? What experiences have you had in meeting guys in places other than bars and clubs? If you can help answer any of these questions and more, or have any other advice to offer him, then please leave your opinions, experiences, and advice in the QComments section.
Need advice? Just send in your questions and the QCollective will get you some answers!