Ask QC: I Don’t Know What To Do

Dear QC,

I’m gay and am still living at home with my family who are very deeply religious and opposed to homosexuality. For the last year I have been having a sexual relationship with one of the members of our church, (he is married with children and a respected elder at our church).

He has started to totally shun me as a person and wont have anything to do with me on an emotional level, so now I feel like I am being used by him as his sex toy. The thing is, I have to admit that I enjoy the sex with him but I want more than just that, I’m starting to have very deep feelings for him. I think I love him and when I mentioned this recently to him he went mad and threatened to end our meetings, and that’s something I don’t want to happen as its my only sexual outlet.

I’m really at a loss as to what to do in this situation, living in this small religious community if I ‘come out’ as gay I know I will be outcast. Is the only choice I have to leave home and my church? Much that I detest their homophobic views, the church and my family are a major part of my life and I’m scared I will lose everything. I really don’t know what to do?

Jerod.

What advice would you give Jerod, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section.
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