Ask QC: What’s the Right or Wrong Thing to Say During Sex?

Ask QC

Hi QC

Hope you guys can help me out here? I’m 19 yo, not that experienced in sex, and have had only a few encounters before I met my current (first) boy friend.

He’s 28 yo, really hot and very experienced in bed so I have been very keen to learn and experience new things with him. The thing is, I did something wrong in bed (or rather SAID something wrong in bed) the other night. I don’t really know how it happened, but I just blurted it out accidentally. He asked if I would like to be rimmed and as I have never had that before I said yes, so I am laying face down in the bed and he’s taking like ages, I mean forever! Well OK it was probably only 20 minutes but it felt like 2 hours LOL! To me it felt kinda weird, I really didn’t know what to expect, I wouldn’t say it was totally unpleasant, in fact it was kinda cool really it got me really hard. But then I fucked up big time, when he came up for air and asked me what I thought of it I just said the first thing that came into my head, I said “Well, you were very thorough!”. The next thing I know my BF is going mad, kicking me out of bed and shouting at me “Very thorough, what you think I’m a freakin car wash or something?” I felt really, really bad and just left.

I texted him the next day and said sorry, and he’s OK about it now, we made up and he said he over reacted (in fact we had a laugh about it!) But the thing is I really don’t know whats the right or wrong thing to say when you’re in bed and having sex? What’s appropriate and what isn’t? I mean, its not like you can give marks out of 10 or say, ummm it was OK, are you supposed to say its great (even when it isn’t?), or do you say it bluntly that you really didn’t like or enjoy something? Like I say, I’m only 19 and still learning and want to please my man as much as I want him to please me. Just wondered if any of you guys have any tips on what to say or what not to say when your in bed with your man?

Thanks!

Jay

Now dirty sex talk is something we see commonly in porn. But what do you actually say to your boyfriend during sex? (Or should there even be any talking?) Imagine if the session is going south, or you’re not very into the “special treatment” he’s giving you, should you give him your honest feedback?
Looks like this will be a very useful learning session for all ages. We’re all ears and eager to know!
Need advice? Just send in your questions and the QCollective will get you some answers!

Jul 12, 2011 By Tim 18 Comments