Ask QC: Getting hit on by a married man!

Hey there,

I’m 24, have a good job starting in a firm since I left college a couple of years back and I’ve been making good progress and just got promoted too. My boss is really great, he’s in his 40’s married with 2 kids, but recently he’s been kinda hitting on me too which was a bit weird at first but now I’m actually enjoying it.

I’m openly gay at work and no problems there and when he started flirting with me I just laughed it off initially. The thing is, now its become a bit more than flirty jokes, there are far too many “accidental” brushing against each other or leaning over where there is obvious body contact. I get invited out for drinks and dinners with him all the time on the pre-text about work, but he usually steers the conversation away from work and it comes around to sex. He says things, like he’s always been fascinated with gay sex but never tried it and would love to sometime, or he’ll tell me what his favorite gay porn sites are.

At first I really thought he was joking, or just trying to be cool about me being gay, now I’m more than a bit intrigued. I have to say, I do feel attracted to him too, I’m not dating seriously with anyone at the moment and it’s very tempting to go just that final step further – should I cross that line?

The other day I was in his car with him and when he dropped me off at home, I swear he leant in to kiss me good night, but just at the last moment I pulled back and got quickly out of the car. I expected there to be some awkwardness at work the next day, but really it was fine and just like usual, good fun to work there, laughing and joking around together – he even managed to make a joke about my rapid departure from his car!

So my dilemma is, even though I know it’s wrong to have sex or an affair with a married man, should I do it anyway? I’m defintely attracted to him both physically and mentally, and he seems to be into me a lot too. Would it be just a bit of fun, or the worst mistake of my life?

Not sure if anyone’s been in this type of situation but any advice or ideas on how to handle it would be a great help, thanks, Maxwell

Hi Maxwell and thanks for writing in with your questions and concerns.. There’s probably some readers who have been hit on by married men before too, and some maybe even took it further than the flirting stage? Although their circumstances may not quite be the same as yours are, there will definitely also be guys who’ve had affiars with married men too. So dear readers, what tips and advice can you offer Maxwell? If you can advise him in any way, then please share your wisdom and advice with all in the QComments section!
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