PataPORN With Chinpoko!
As we begin Chinpoko’s weekly rant, QC feels obligated to remind our readers these are Chinpoko’s opinions… not our own. We’ve tried to persuade him, but there’s no reasoning with a stiff dick, so onward to PATAPORN WITH CHINPOKO!
Corbin Fisher: Elijah’s First Time
Okay, before you watch this video, YOU HAVE TO READ CORBIN’S DESCRIPTION! It made me hard, you should read it for yourself, and that’s all I will say about that.
Prepare yourself ladies, because this is one hot video. I don’t care if this is really Elijah’s first time or not—let’s be honest, he’s probably fucked an entire soccer team in an ally while drunk off his ass—but Corbin says it’s his first. Whatever you say Corbin, just keep bringing the hot boys.
It probably doesn’t matter which time it is for Elijah, because Elijah made me feel like it was my first time. Seriously, if I had an ass I’d beg for Elijah to pop my cherry! Oh, the way he moans and groans throughout the scene, you can tell he’s totally loving it. Jared is also a super cute twink. As he bounces on Eli’s cock, his hair flops along with his hard cock. And I love the way his cheeks get flushed.
The cumshot is the hottest part. Jared swallows the load AND jerks himself off at the same time. Jared’s quite the gentleman.
Hottest post of the week! PATA, PATA, PATA!
QCA Art: François Sagat in Wet Dreams
Oh my God. I never get tired of Francois Sagat. I think he has one of the most well-proportioned bodies in the business. He’s not too big and his legs aren’t super skinny (cough Jeremy from this week’s Randy Blue cough cough!). I love these wet shots, except here’s the problem: I got Zero magazine so I could nut on the pages of lovely Francois, but… I DON’T HAVE ANY MOTHERFUCKING HANDS! I CAN’T TURN THE PAGES! Damn you, animator… damn you! Hmmm, maybe I need to get a butler. Yes, a cock butler!
Hot House Safe Sex Posters
It’s about motherfuckin’ time! Finally some safe-sex posters with some actual butt pounding! It really makes sense when you think about it; putting the message with the actual act will make people think of it more often. And come on, who doesn’t want to think about some of the boys from Hot House while slipping on the old cock overcoat?!
Chaos Men: Riley
There’s something just beautiful about a man jerking-off naked and all alone. It also helps that Riley has got a nice long dick on that lean body of his.
And you know what the best part of this video is? He has gay speak.
As soon as Riley opens his mouth it’s pretty obvious he’s gay and that he’s real comfortable with himself. It was so refreshing to see this compared to so many porn actors who feel they have to butch it up and act all straight. I actually know a few porn actors. I’ve seen their videos and I’ve seen how they are in public and it’s totally different. On video you’d think they’re totally straight, but in real life… big ol’ nellies (cough Co—cough—dy Cumm—cough—ings). Mmm… excuse me… allergies.
I think Riley’s self-comfort and solo make him even hotter. In fact, watching him felt just like sitting on the end of his bed while he had a hot moment with himself. Oh and I love it when this boy licks his head with his tongue—that’s talent.
Cock Quiz: Can You Name Six Recent QCocks?
It’s the cock version of Who Wants to be a Millionaire! Did any of you get them right? I’m ashamed to admit this… BUT I GOT THEM ALL RIGHT. Okay I’m not ashamed; I was only trying to be nice to you poor guys who can’t get your dicks straight. HAHA… dicks straight! Chinpoko’s on a roll today! PATA PATA PATA!!
Now if you failed the cock quiz, you know what that means… MORE STUDYING!!!! Don’t think I won’t bring it up again next week. I will want to see some improvement, so it looks like you’re going to have to get out there and get turned on!
