The Return Of PataPORN With Chinpoko!!!
Hey all you QueerClickers! It’s your favorite man-sticker — me, Chinpoko! It’s been a long while since we’ve watched porn together, but I’m back and ready to blow my load on this week’s sexy selection… and have I got some good picks for you! There’s blowjobs, toys, fur, jockstraps, military men and even a crazy video that you’ll have to see to believe! But enough talk… grab some lube and get ready for PataPORN WITH CHINPOKO!!!
Gayhoopla: Dimitry Dickov and Phillip
RATING: 4 OUT OF 5: FULLY ERECT
Watching sexy brunette Phillip get it on with furry blonde Dimitry Dickov (very Eastern European sounding porn name, by the way) is like being a voyeur at their hot, private hook-up. Both men are fit and clean-cut with nice dicks and just enough hair to get you fur-lovers all hot and bothered.
Admittedly, the hook-up isn’t perfect. Dickov’s dick is so big that poor Phillip can hardly down it, and Dickov thrusts his hips in a mechanical way that makes it look like he’s calculating sports statistics instead of selfishly skull fucking his mate.
But things get steamy once Dimitry gets his lips on Phillip’s lean, uncut piece. You can hear Phillip moan and while his muscular ass cheeks happily thrust upward into Dickov’s face. And Dickov has a pretty nice ass too. Once he gets Phillip belly-down on the carpet, it’s a delight watching his nice round butt pump his fat pole deep into Phil’s hole. Tall Dickov also leans over and kisses Phillip while fucking him — wow!
Luckily, the men soon change position so that we can really see Dickov’s dick fill up Phillip. And to top it all off, Dickov ends by blowing a load across Phillip’s handsome face. Phew! Thanks for inviting us over to watch, you hot sluts!
HOT SPOTS – Phil and Dimitry got some chemistry going on and their bodies are beautiful. Plus the fucking is pretty hot.
COLD SORES – Both guys need to go back to blowjob school and work on their kissing skills. Hey boys! Practice on me!
ChaosMen: Santiago Serviced By Ransom
RATING: 4 OUT OF 5: FULLY ERECT
I’d pay a handsome sum to be kidnapped by Ransom (see what I did there?). Seriously, his hot suck-scenario with Santiago would pleasure anyone — he’s got tattoos, light bondage, a foot fetish, a furry muscle-stud with a uncut dick, a dildo, a Fleshjack, some rimming, and of course, some serious dick-sucking lips.
For those of you who haven’t watched a ChaosMen Edge video before, you’re in luck. It starts a little slow with Ransom carefully tying up Santiago and lightly teasing his cock. But by the time Ransom strips off Santi’s undies and begins sucking the strong stud’s ample dick, the sounds of slobber and Santi’s moans will have you hard as a rock, err, I mean, cock.
Also, ChaosMen’s Edge videos intercut scenes of cock-sucking with scenes of Ransom using toys on Santiago and rimming him good. The fact that Santiago’s dick stays fully hard while being rimmed makes me think this isn’t his first time having his salad tossed… PATA, PATA, PATA!
You also get a chance to see Ransom work his beautifully curved cock through the arches of Santiago’s feet. When both guys blow their loads, you probably will have too.
OH YES – Ransom sucks a decent dick and Santiago’s body alone is enough to get you edging.
OH NO – Often when Santiago has the blindfold off, he seems less turned on — but damn he’s got a great bod.
FREAKS OF THE WEEK
CFNMTV.com – Jocks Ordered to Strip Naked – Hmmm… something seems strangely familiar about CNFMTV.com’s “newest” video of hunky jocks stripping down for a demanding lady coach. Could it be because QueerClick posted pretty much the same pictures back in 2010??! Or could it be because QC has been milking this cow with sore udders since 2006!!! Back then QC even released photos of the darned thing in TEN DIFFERENT INSTALLMENTS! Give this cash cow a rest, Team Orange!! I mean, it’s always great to see those healthy rumps and cocks again, but three times is a charm, eh??
TROUGH XIII PROMO – If you crossed gold lamé-clad disco boys from the 60s with home workout videos from the 80s, you’d get this video. It’s a promo for a party, but what in the holy living crap is going on in it?!! First, they start working out with weird gym equipment in stretchy gold leotards, then they pull out a huge hypodermic needle and a cushioned breastplate with nipples on it. What, is this a PSA about steroids or something? I’m turned on, but soooo confused. As a bonus, this weird little flick also features Buck Angel (if you like your gym-daddies with a side of pussy).
CHINPOKO’S QUICK CUMSHOTS
All American Heroes: Vince – If you like military men, furry bods, uncut dicks and cute asses, you’ll definitely want to visit Vince’s barracks.
Lucas Kazan: Will and Dario – Don’t act like you don’t like big-dicked bottom Dario Beck because you know you do, even if his scene partner does smoke cigarettes. So what? Dario smokes unfiltered cock.
Fitness Hunk Tied & Stripped at BreederFuckers – The furry muscle stud in this video — who doubles as Master Jamie at Brutal Tops — also doubles as an abuse sponge at Breed Fuckers. Stroke your meat as they tie, gag, clothespin and whip his beautiful bod — plus, he wears the frilliest jockstrap you’ve ever seen!
Hot House: Darius Ferdynand and Billy Santoro – If my proctologist looked like this, I’d visit him all the time, even if I just had a runny nose. And the curve in Darius’ lengthy cock hits his big-dicked, muscle daddy’s G-spot in all the right ways — nurse, grab me a towel and some wet wipes, stat!
Well that’s all for me this week! It’s so good to be back. I missed you all and all of this great porn too! We have a lot of catching up to do. So while I’m watching this next week’s hot and steamy sex flicks, GO OUT THERE AND GET TURNED ON!
