QC FYI: Congested? Masturbate!

Rising medical costs may make the coming cold and flu season even more miserable. Luckily, relief may be within reach according to new study entitled, “Ejaculation as a potential treatment of nasal congestion in mature males” published in The Journal of Medical Hypotheses. It seems that five fingers and a few minutes may be all you need to alleviate chronic congestion and horniness.
According to the study, most over-the-counter decongestants relieve congestion by stimulating adrenergic receptors that constrict nasal blood vessels. The author reasons that ejaculation will stimulate adrenergic receptors shortly after ejaculation, giving you relief from your cold. What that means is that blowing your wad should make it easier to blow your nose— now there’s more than one reason to keep tissues near your bedside.
We know getting your rocks off isn’t a high priority when you’re sick, but is there anyone out there with a head cold that can test this scientific theory for us?