Today Is Talk Like A Pirate Day!

Well shiver our timbers and swash our buckles! It’s international Talk Like A Pirate Day! We’re mostly interested in butt-piracy but we also like a good sword fight on the poop deck especially when there’s booty to be plundered! Arrrrr! So you can either take pirate talking lessons from this YouTube instructor or visit the link above for lots more pirate talk tips, including these handy come-ons:

“Well blow me down?”

“Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you”

“I’d love to drop anchor in your lagoon”

“Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.”

If you’re just a junior buccaneer, you can bone up on your gay pirate history at Uncylopedia which includes info on one of the most fey pirates of all time, Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow in Pirates of the Carribean. Depp discussed his very gay preparations for the role during an interview with Rolling Stone:

[Johnny] Depp says he was intrigued by a scholarly work titled “Sodomy and the Pirate Tradition.” “I liked the idea of [Jack] being ambiguous,” he tells Mark Binelli in the new summer double issue of Rolling Stone. “Because women were thought to be bad luck on ships. And these pirates would go out for years at a time. So, you know, there is a possibility that one thing might lead to another. You’re lonely. You have an extra ration of rum. ‘Cabin boy!'”

And if you’re an experienced seaman still searching avast for more pirating fun, check out gay pirates and punishments like walkin’ the plank! (Gettin’ wet off a hunk of wood would Jolly our Roger). Find out what to do with a drunken sailor—a gay pirate cocktail that’s strong and fruity, just like you, matey! Take a quiz to see how long you could last on a gay pirate ship. Or, if you act in the next 4 and a half hours, you could get a free download of the old-skool pirating game, Tales of Monkey Island.