What happens when you put a grown man with a PopTart for an arm in leotards and a cat mask on a stationary bike with a rainbow flag? This, apparently. Of course, his is just the live action version of this incredibly weird and cute web meme.
It’s been a crazy week at QueerClick and you won’t believe the crazy QComments that have come in about Jake Shears’ jockstrap, Girth Brooks’ reluctance to take a dick, and the pubic regions of some of this week’s amateur studs. So why wait? Join us for a dip in the QComment pool—the water’s fine!
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Everyone knows that all sports are kinda gay, especially golf with its balls, holes, and stick-handling men trying to finish in as few as strokes as possible—disgusting (which reminds us… where is the Tiger Woods sex tape we were promised?). But just because you play a homoerotic sport doesn’t make it OK to delivered unsolicited ass slaps in the locker room. In fact, if you’re not careful, you may end up getting a bigger handful than you wanted… like this poor sucker. But we can’t say we’d mind having our hand firmly between this muscleman’s buttcheeks. Keep our gloves warm for us, would you love?
We love sashimi, but sometimes you just wanna enjoy a nice piece of raw meat at home. That’s why we love this guy. Still dressed in his work shirt and slacks, he’s willing to kick back, untuck, loosen his pants, bust out his chopsticks and enjoy a pre-dinner snack. And you can tell he’s done this before, the way he gently handles his piece until it’s ready to burst with flavor. And what is that white sauce on his pants? Is that fresh roe?!! Oh how we do love good Japanese food!
Move over Chip Tanner! Compared to scruffy, pink shorts-wearing Jacob Sharpe you’re just but a juggling hobbyist. Sharpe shows off some of the most insane ball-handling skills you’ve ever seen—seriously, is this guy a superhero with super coordination and sixth-sense or what? And the fact that the bearded young hottie does it all shirtless and in a pair of tight pink shorts…. ahhhhh! Oh, Mr. Sharpe! Please let us run away and join the circus with you!
Video via
You can always tell a good yoga instructor by the size of his pole. Self-proclaimed Tantric Kundalini yoga instructor Phillip Ryan Deal* has a huge pole, that is, a huge stripper pole that he keeps in his studio. You see, he’s also a male stripper and “sexologist” who incorporates sexual movements into his naked yoga positions. Why? So you can use those same Kama Sutra positions in the bedroom and achieve mind and wad-blowing, soul-erupting sex!!!(just like him)!!! Can you master the acrobatic array of Sean Cody sex positions??
His yoga moves also incorporate common stripper tropes like “The Booty Clap”, “The Dick Slam” and “The Floor Grind” to uncoil the great creative energy hiding in your ass. Practice hard enough and Phillip might even teach you about “spreading your asshole” so you can achieve the awesomest anal arousal ever—like this. Dreams really DO cum buckets!
This is not your gay uncle’s softcore naked yoga! Check out Phillip’s tantric hooker moves, after the jump!
*aka XTube star adamlikesapples
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It’s the eve of Prince William and Kate Middleton’s Royal Wedding! And to celebrate, here’s the happy couple talking openly about when Prince William popped the big one. No, not “the big question” but his big dick into her ass! Yes, yes… it’s always a private and romantic affair when your loved one finally gives up their virganalty. But when you’ve been staring at his royal jewels for as long as we have, it’s kinda hard not to be hard, err… we mean, interested in every little detail of their love life. When should we expect the royal sex tape?
We don’t normally suggest putting sharp objects next to your wiener, but this guy makes it look strangely hot. Watch as he tweaks his nipple, gently rubs the rim of his cock head with the sharpened lead, and then works himself to a spurting orgasm while rubbing the wooden shaft against his! Which reminds us, our student readers will soon start their final exams! After you get done procrasturbating, take a tip from this guy and be sure to use a number two pencil for all your hard work—and neatness counts!
Having a boyfriend rocks but all the dull dating and and drugging drinks just to find one can be a real drag. Well not anymore! Just pick up the phone and order yourself your very own boyfriend! He’ll do you, your chores, protect the house, and also battle to the death for your honor. Who could ask for more? But watch out, you could very easily end up with two boyfriends and some guys say that “Two boyfriends are two too many!”
Michael Lucas makes each of his porn epics fabulously over-the-top! After all this is the same man who directed La Dolce Vita, the self-proclaimed “most expensive porn movie ever made!” So it’s no wonder that his latest release, a dark and edgy sex-filled action flick called Assassin, would come with its own music video by pop singer Sir Ari Gold.
The film itself features a fine-assed stable of delicious men including Adam Killian, Wilfried Knight, Steven Daigle, Cliff Jensen, Drew Cutler, Braxton Bond, Rafael Alencar, as well as Brad Star and Junior Stellano (who we had the pleasure of exclusively interviewing)!
We’ve got pictures of all these studs as well as more about the film after the jump!
Not everyone is lucky enough to have the blessed foreskin but those who aren’t circumcised know how handy a foreskin can be. Not only does it protect the head of the penis, it also makes a great place to hide chocolate candies! Xtreme Skater and XM Radio host, Jason Ellis knows it. Last December he went on Howard Stern’s radio just to show how many M&Ms he could slip inside his turtleneck. But when when Sal Governale heard about about Jason’s feat, he whipped out his uncut cock and challenged Jason to an on-air challenge!
Which man will win? You’ll have to go after the jump to find out!
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Every member of Team Orange loves working at QueerClick, but when we laid eyes on the offices of the fetish gear company Slick It Up!, we couldn’t help but feel a tinge jealous. Using gimps for chairs, bringing pets to work, and everyday seems to be casual Friday. Plus who can resist working with sexy studs Chase Hostler and David Mason. Oh, and who’s this?! They even managed to get Francois Sagat to give up his own candy sling for a valued customer. If only we didn’t love our current jobs so much! Oh well, we’re sure the boys at Slick It Up! probably have a lot of positions and openings that need, ahem… filling.
We may not always agree on our taste in men, porn, or politics. But there’s something we can all agree on… that skateboarding on dogs is awesome!
We’ve all been there before. You go to the bar all dressed up and have a drink hoping someone will come around. Then you start texting out of boredom before deciding to go home and jerk off instead. Rest assured, it’s not pathetic… in fact, mega-hot businessmen do it too! Just check out this chiseled stud downing an overpriced cocktail before going back to his weirdly sterile hotel room to strip down for what seems the most boring cyber-sex session ever.
Not only are they horrible at dirty talk— “MMMMM” “REALLY?” “WOULD YOU DARE?”—but his web cam has horrible resolution. You’d think a world traveling, designer underwearing guy with a personal trainer could afford a higher quality webcam or at least a classy hooker. You’d be wrong. See? Sometimes hot men have boring sex lives too.
At least his chat partner uses a default male avatar meaning that this commercial for Gregg Homme Underwear definitely gay (like Men at Play) instead of pretending to be for women (like Playgirl). They also say this video is to be continued. Uhhh, unless the next video is off this guy jerking off and sticking toys into his butt, we’re hard pressed to figure out how to make him any more naked. But will we watch. Oh yes, we will…
Oh but what’s this? Apparently Gregg Homme released another two parter softcore after the jump. Let’s see what we can expect, shall we?
Continue with “Hot Businessman Can’t Get Laid, Resorts To Mediocre Cybersex”
Over the years big-dicked Cody Cummings has slowly edged closer and closer to gay sex: getting a huge cock rubbed between his buttcheeks, using butt toys, and popping a dum-dum in his tight pucker. He’s even sucked cock—though it was only Tommy D’s dick and his own cock … does that make him gay?
Either way, we’ve interviewed Cody to ask him about his increasingly gay sex scenes and it seems like in an upcoming release he’s finally going to kiss and jerk-off a dude—none other than sexy vers stud (and Austin Wilde boyf) Anthony Romero! The trailer is mega-hot with Cody groping Anthony’s hot ass and getting closer and closer for a kiss… cue the dramatic end-of-the-world music!
But wait a minute… The Sword think this all sounds very familiar:
Pushing limits is great, but let’s not act like Cody hasn’t kissed a dude before. Remember Rod Daily? And if I remember correctly, didn’t Cody stroke Tommy D’s cock in that fourgy from like three years ago? To be fair, this is the first time that Cody has gay kissed and touched gay dick in the same scene.
Hmm… baby steps to excellence perhaps. Maybe we can look forward to the day that Cody lets more than just a lollipop, a buttplug, or a tongue in his hole. Or imagine if he actually tops a guy, especially a porn star with a virgin hole! Oh Cody, you magnificent tease. You drive us boys crazy only because we want you to do more!
When we showed the the intensely arty and hot amateur sex videos of The Black Spark we said that it would be long before he had his imitators. Well that day has come and it is good! Meet The Red Spark and Drasko Bogdanovic, two sexy slender studs who are taking arty JO scenes to the next level.
Each guy has his own style. The Red Spark is like Black Spark lite: he’s got some some black light strip tease action, bleeds food coloring in the bathtub, and eats a lollipop fresh out of his own ass but you can tell he’s just getting started in experimenting how to turn us on with his artistic vision and his body. Drasko Bogdanovic on the other hand has us boned by starting with a slow sensuous stripping and then working his long, uncut meat into a bedazzling kaleidoscope of dicks! And for those of you who miss The Black Spark, Fleshbot informs us that he’s actually scheduled a nationwide tour, so you may get to see him work his black magic in person very soon!
But for those who just can’t get enough of arty porn flair, we have a twisted surprise for you over at QCX’s Fetish 101! Do the words “bisexual mutant orgy” mean anything to you? Oh they will…