I’m 27 and going out with a great, handsome guy. We’re monogamous and very much into each other. We’ve been dating for about six months and go to bed and wake up usually kissing, sucking, and jerking each other off. My dick stays hard throughout… until he mentions sex.
The instant he says “Fuck me,” I get real nervous and go limp. Even when I put my cock anywhere near his ass, I’ll go soft within seconds. It’s a real shame especially since he’s got a great ass and a good attitude. He hasn’t pressured me or made me feel bad, but I want to top him and am getting frustrated—he wants it bad and I’m tired of always being the bottom.
All the books and websites call it “performance anxiety” but I don’t know what to do. I topped my ex two or three times after a lot of failed attempts. It’s gotten to the point where I feel like I’ll need Viagra, hypno- or sex-therapy just to fuck the guy I like. Meanwhile, all my other gay friends seem to fuck with no problem.
What should I do?
Alex
Have you ever experienced what Alex is going through? What advice would you give him, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I’ve been foolish and stupid in the past but I have to admit I’ve got myself in a really sticky situation at work this time and I’m not sure what to do.
I hold a managerial position with a major hotel group, and one of our golden rules is that you do not fraternize with the guests on a sexual level and certainly not in the hotel. I have to admit I got a bit carried away with a very hot guy, we ended up in his room and unfortunately we were caught on the hotel’s security video in the elevator and hallway.
A member of staff is now threatening to show this video unless I make sure he gets a promotion. If he makes it public for sure I will lose my job, but if I promote him it would also mean an innocent member of staff loses their job to make way for him. I feel like I’m trapped and being blackmailed and I really don’t know what to do. He says he just wants the promotion but I don’t know if he will actually stop there with just that or if it will get worse. I know I’ve been an idiot but, jobs are hard to come by right now and I don’t know what to do.
JN.
What advice would you give JN, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
My problem is one mainly of career choice, or rather should I say it’s prejudice and discrimination against me being gay in the very homophobic industry in which I am currently employed.
I’ve always been a very rough, masculine type, very much into the outdoors and sports and so naturally gravitated towards subjects which eventually led to the career in which I now find myself (Heavy Industrial Engineering). The thing is, when I was choosing education courses that pretty much pre-determined this career path, I hadn’t really clearly defined or accepted myself as a gay man at that time.
Now in my mid-thirties I find myself trapped in a very homophobic environment, and not being able to be ‘out’ at work, I find it very frustrating, especially having to listen to homophobic ‘jokes’ and comments. At 34, it may seem a little late for a career change, but it would be good to know what industries and businesses are more likely to be open, accepting and gay friendly so that I don’t make the same mistake twice. Where I am right now, as a single man I’m not earmarked for promotion, and its been said many times they only want to promote married men with kids – in any case I’m fed up where I am now. I do accept myself as a gay man and I’m out at home and with my friends and family but I know coming out at work, and particularly the homophobic environment I now work in would be a complete disaster – its easier to move on than be subjected to that hate and torment.
I realize that there will always be prejudice of some degree in any work place, but if I’m going to make this move I want to at least be somewhere that doesn’t have any issues with your sexuality and its just based on performance. Any tips on a career change to a more accepting industry or business would be really helpful and much appreciated.
Many thanks,
John.
PS: I guess you guys at QC don’t have this problem at work right? LOL!
Indeed John, our work place is the probably the least homophobic (and fun) place anyone could wish to work! So dear QC readers, what advice would you give John in making that career change? Which jobs, businesses or industries are the most gay friendly? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I wanted to ask, is it possible to have multiple orgasms, by that I mean one after another consecutively for like a few minutes. I’ve had several orgasms in a day, the most I did was 7 but that was over 5 hours and I had to rest between each one. I just wondered is there any way you can prolong cumming in such away that you can shoot all these orgasms together?
Is there a limit to how many times you can or should cum in any given time period, day, week, month?). Hope you don’t mind me asking this, it’s just that I enjoy having sex so much I just want to keep on improving and getting better and better at it, hehe 🙂
Charlie
What do you think dear QC readers? Is there a limit to how many times you can orgasm? Can you have multiple orgasms and what’s the best way to learn and practice? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help Charlie in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I’m 26 years old and living with an absolutely gorgeous man of 32 with whom I want to share the rest of my life together. We are both very much in love, and on Christmas Day he proposed, which really swept me off my feet!
I feel I am ready for this, (although we haven’t actually worked out where we will have our commitment ceremony) but I do have a problem, one which actually terrifies me – meeting his parents! I’m sure some may feel it pales in comparison with other problems here, but when my BF has asked me to meet his parents I just freaked out completely.
We’ve been together for nearly two years now, live, work together and share our lives completely. But this is our life and one which we have carved out for ourselves in NYC, and the thought of meeting his overbearing parents chills me. Although I have never met them personally, I know that my BF was bullied and abused by his parents, who shunned him when he came out. Now that he has a successful business, worked through college with no help from them, I’m perplexed that he wants to travel all the way back to Texas for this meeting. Worst yet, is that his parents live out of town so we will be trapped in their house for the whole weekend.
Part of the problem I have is that I am angry with the way his family have treated him, and I anticipate them being judgmental of both me and of our relationship. And I’m not even sure what the correct etiquette is in a situation like this, what our sleeping arrangements will be, do I take a gift, nor do I know if I will be able to hold back and tell them just exactly what I think of them?
I’m not sure I can go through with this, but his mind is set on the ‘Meeting the Parents’ thing, so I would dearly appreciate any advice on how to get through this much dreaded weekend. Thanks everyone.
Dean R.
What experiences have you been through when meeting the parents, any advice tips or horror stories? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice for Dean in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I’m writing in as I have a sort of fetish (I think it is?) but it’s definitely a problem for when I try to meet up with other guys and to find a boy friend. It’s really preventing me from getting into a steady relationship, something I really want, so I just wondered if there are a) any guys out there who have the same preference as me and b) are their guys out there would want to be in a relationship with someone who has my ‘fetish’.
And when I say fetish I’m not even really sure if this is classified as one (I think the term might be voyeur but I’m not really sure). The thing is, I’m gay and I totally adore the male body but don’t want to have any physical contact with it or in a relationship. In fact what I want is to watch a guy masturbate but there has to be a certain amount of ‘distance’ between us.
I’m sure this sounds pretty weird to a lot of you, but my ideal boy friend would be someone who enjoys stripping for me and masturbating whilst I watch. Also they would not want me to touch them at all. I’m not sure if I will ever find a guy like this, I’m 22 now and although I’ve dated, I’ve always been a disappointment when its got to the stage where we are supposed to have sex. I had one miserable failed attempt when I hooked up with a guy recently, he did masturbate for me but then left before he ejaculated and said it was just too weird for him with me only watching and not being involved. I do like to jerk off but not at the same time, and so I think that may have helped if I did that?
I hope you don’t mind me asking this question here, I’ve been a big fan of QC for a few years now and I get so turned on by watching solo jerk off sessions, it just seems natural to me that I would want to be in the presence of a guy doing that for me. I really want to know, would there be a boyfriend for me out there who would take me for what I am. I guess they would have to be a bit exhibitionist and enjoy masturbating in front of me but not want to have any physical contact with me. Sorry this email is so long, its sort of difficult to describe or try to explain fully, but I would really like to hear from anyone who knows about this or has experience of it or knows where I can meet guys like this?
Thanks
Mikey R.
We all have our sexual preferences and there are many different types of relationships out there. What experiences and advice would you give Mikey, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I’m 20 years old so I guess I have stopped growing physically and should be at my sexual ‘peak’ by now. The thing is I have a very small penis, and by small I mean its only 1″ when flaccid and 3″ when fully erect.
I’ve been ashamed by this and become very introverted, I was bullied and teased at school all of which has made me feel so inadequate. I’m starting to come to terms with it and accept my body and the fact that I will never have a big cock, but what I wanted to ask was, are there guys out there who would like someone like me, even with such a small cock?
When I look at porn all the guys have really big cocks, and that’s the sort of boyfriend I want. But I’m afraid to approach guys to date for fear of them rejecting me when they find out my cock is so small. Is 3″ too small, would anyone like that?
Lee.
Does size matter? Is it important at all? What advice would you give Lee, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I’m gay and am still living at home with my family who are very deeply religious and opposed to homosexuality. For the last year I have been having a sexual relationship with one of the members of our church, (he is married with children and a respected elder at our church).
He has started to totally shun me as a person and wont have anything to do with me on an emotional level, so now I feel like I am being used by him as his sex toy. The thing is, I have to admit that I enjoy the sex with him but I want more than just that, I’m starting to have very deep feelings for him. I think I love him and when I mentioned this recently to him he went mad and threatened to end our meetings, and that’s something I don’t want to happen as its my only sexual outlet.
I’m really at a loss as to what to do in this situation, living in this small religious community if I ‘come out’ as gay I know I will be outcast. Is the only choice I have to leave home and my church? Much that I detest their homophobic views, the church and my family are a major part of my life and I’m scared I will lose everything. I really don’t know what to do?
Jerod.
What advice would you give Jerod, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I was circumcised when I was a baby, and until I started dating guys with foreskins I hadn’t really given this much thought.
But over the last two years I have been in a relationship with a wonderful boyfriend who has the most beautiful and tender foreskin. I just love the way it looks, the way it dangles and I just cant stop nibbling, licking and sucking it!
I love it so much (and him of course!) that I really want to have my own foreskin. I have read up a bit about foreskin restoration and I see there are a few products on the market that can do this (basically most of them are clamps which slowly stretch the skin back over several months/years).
I wondered if there are any readers who have restored their foreskins? What are the best methods, any problems that occurred and were they happy with the results? Most of the websites that sell these products have testimonials but it would be great to hear from some guys who have actually done it, rather than reading some sales blurb.
Cheers,
Kaden (QC fan!)
Any readers out there who’ve restored their foreskins? What advice would you give Kaden, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I have a question that I hope the QC readers can help me with?.
Ever since I knew I was gay, (from about the age of 13), I have always had a crush on older guys, and I don’t mean older by just by a few years. I’m 22 now and love guys in their 40’s and 50’s, especially those slightly overweight and graying/balding. So I seem to go for guys who are at least 20+ years older than myself.
I know this doesn’t fit the gay ‘norm’ (whatever that is) and I’m also quite aware that the gay community describes these as ‘Daddy/Son’ relationships. None of this bothers me, nor do I care what other people think about these types of relationships, but I wondered if there are any readers out their who have experienced being in a long term committed relationship of this type?
The reason I ask is that, although I have dated some older guys over the last few years (which I really enjoyed), I’m really looking for a long term relationship with an older guy. I guess my main concern is that do these types of relationships last, is the age difference too much especially bearing in mind when I’m in my 50’s my partner would be in his 70’s? It would be reassuring to know of any long term relationships of this kind, the pitfalls and any advice the readers might have to offer.
Thanks in advance
Joey.
Anyone readers out there who have been in this type of relationship or situation before? What advice would you give Joey, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I have a friend who was gay. I use the word ‘was’ because he changed his mind. He’s 25 and decided that before he’s 30, he wants to have kids. So he broke up with his boyfriend, told everyone he was now straight and called up an ex-girlfriend to ‘give things another go’ as he put it.
I just think he’s making a terrible mistake. He always said that things never seemed right with women, and that he was so much more comfortable when he was with men. Ever since I’ve known him, not once has he evr mentioned the opposite sex, except to idolise personalities like Kathy Griffin, Janet Jackson, and Katey Segal. He’s clearly gay, and he had excepted that, but now he’s doing a complete 180 and convinced himself otherwise. He seems to have forgotten that he told me about his trouble with women and has now hanged his story to he liked them all along. But there’s no denying his sexuality.
I understand that he wants a family, and that it’s difficult for gay couples to have what’s considered ‘normalcy’, but I can’t help but feel that he will lock himself into a loveless marriage which will end up hurting himself, his wide and his kids. I really don’t think he’ll be happy and that worries me so much, I can’t imagine a life where you deny who and what you are. He’s a good person, just self-delusional.
I don’t know what I should do. Should I stay out of it. When push comes to shove, it really is none of my business. Or should I confront him, remind him about how he used to talk and try and convince him that living a lie will do more harm than good.
Thanks in advance for any advice you can give,
Jake
How should Jake handle this situation with his friends, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
Since you have so much experience maybe you can help me out here. I am an 18 year old quarterback for a winning football team. I am 6’2″ tall 195 and built like a brick. Everyone, including my father who is the coach, thinks I am the REAL man. I have even been with several girls just to keep up the facade. As you can see this is the problem but now the real problem. My receiver is also the same height, build and in the shower both very well endowed and uncut. I can barely take a shower without getting a hard-on over him. One of the defensive lineman noted we were twins down to the massive size of our dicks and the rest of the team started calling him fag and queer because he would notice such a thing. Now you know what the “F” I am up against. I am very masculine so no one would ever guess the star quarterback is gay or bi I guess.
Please help me here. The receiver is , I think, is hopelessly hetero-sexual. I want to go out with him, make love to him. How do I approach this without getting killed, destroy my reputation, not get kicked off the team and humiliate my dad who I love very much.
Thanks,
Hidden Jock
What advice would you give Jock, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
Dear QC,
I am a loyal reader of the site and love to provide advice when I can. Now I find myself needing advice.
I’ve known this guy, lets call him Nick, for the past 4 years. When I met him I couldn’t stand him, and was actually lusting after his older brother (which was a huge mistake). I did like Nick a little bit when I did meet him though. Thought he was a great guy. Well something happened (a lot of drama) and we lost touch with each other about a year later.
Now on to what I need advice on. About two months ago, I was doing something on my computer. When out of the blue I get a message from someone I don’t recognize and it turns out to be Nick. We talk the entire day and even into the next without any sleep at all. About a week later I realized that I like him…a lot. It wasn’t long after that that he told me that he loved me. I have always had trust issues, but I thought that it’s time to take a chance at love again. So I let him get close to me. And I love him more than most people can love in their own lifetime. Well He’s been talking about suicide because he wants to be out of where he lives (lives in Canada) and go to New York then come here to where I live. But with money and finances the way it’s at with both of us, it’s not looking like it’s going to happen on time. And he’s been talking about suicide and I can’t lose him. I don’t know what to do about this. I’ve beat myself up so much and I’ve cried. I don’t know what to do about this. He’s 20 and I’m 24.
Needing help with advice.
Garrett
What advice would you give Garrett, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
After years of only going as far as giving and receiving blow jobs, I recently started having anal sex. In all scenarios, I have always bottomed because I am a clean freak who borders on OCD. I laboriously clean and prep myself whenever I go out in the event that I do hook up with someone. I don’t want any accidents while in the mist of getting it on and fortunately haven’t ran into any.
My problem is, I don’t want to always bottom. There have been numerous instances where I have wanted to top a guy but my clean freak tendencies cause me to worry about whether or not the guy has bothered to go through the cleaning process as thoroughly as I have. (I highly doubt anyone goes through as thorough a cleaning process! =P)
So the question is, what are the rules of etiquette if fecal matter does happen to become present during sex? We are talking about the ass after all. I’m sure it has happened to numerous guys. How do I handle myself? Is it okay to ask if a guy is clean down there before we begin play? Do I ignore its presence and continue? Is it rude to stop to address it? Is it rude to stop all together? What’s the standard procedure?
I don’t know what to do and would love some help. Any past scenarios and how it was handled would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.
Clean Seeker
Are you a dirty bottom hater, like Clean Seeker? What advice would you give him, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I’ve met this guy online a few months ago who I really like, he’s also into the same stuff as me and the same age, we’re both 20yo. He’s smart, gorgeous, kind and funny. We really have a laugh together and I know I’m falling for him, but the thing is he is thousands of miles away (he’s east coast I’m west).
What are the chances of us progressing and developing a loving relationship rather than just friendship? I already feel like I’m falling in love with him and he has said as much too. Is it unrealistic of me to expect that such a romance can happen? I just feel so happy when we’re chatting online and I want to be with him all the time. We’re both in college now, but I can switch courses so that I would be in the same city as him, its something we’ve discussed already as possible. I realize its a big risk, my heart tells me yes but my head tells me no – the thing is I really want to give romance a chance. Has anyone had experience of relationships like this and did it work out?
Thanks in advance guys!
Alex.
Anyone out there with experience of this? What advice would you give Alex, dear QC readers? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I have a problem that when I cum it just sort of dribbles out a bit and I really want to cum like loads and loads more. My current boyfriend shoots really far, like right above his shoulders, sometimes right over his head! And I would say his load is at least 10 times more than mine.
I’ve tried not jerking off for more than a week to try and build up the sperm in my balls but the result is just the same, I just get this dribble of cum. I notice quite a few of the porn stars cum bucket loads and I want to be able to do that. Is there anyway I can get my cum to spurt really far and is there any special diet or supplements I can take to produce more cum?
thanks, Lyle xoxo
Any tips dear QC readers and what advice would you give Lyle? Please feel free to share your own experiences and advice to help him in the comments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
