Did you watch LOGO’s The A-List: New York? You didn’t? Good! Because the only good reason for watching was this guy, Rodiney Santiago. He’s a Brazilian underwear model they decided to subtitle throughout the entire show. He was also the hottest, most genuine guy in the entire show (alongside Ryan and Mike). Anyway, he released a 2011 calendar for himself and had this sizzling video for 2(x)ist underwear just in time to stuff your stocking!
Via Fleshbot
Who likes big dicks? We like big dicks! And so do Johnny McGovern and Calpernia Addams. Johnny seems to release a new video every holiday season—last year it was Bossy Bottom and the year before that it was Dirty Gay Christmas. This time around because you’ve been such a bad boy, the Gay Pimp Daddy is delivering an extra big package down your chimney. And we gotta say it has got our eyes bulging out of our skulls. How we LOVE muscular twinks with big dicks. You hear that Zach Alexander and Kurt Wild? WE LOVE YOU!!!! Oh and you too, Calpernia!
Sometimes the happy-go-lucky hijinks of the perpetual after-school special GLEE brightens our day and other times it makes us wanna slam our heads in a car door. But the dreamy smile of show’s newest heartthrob Darren Criss always warms our cockles. And now that we’ve found a picture of him shirtless you can consider our chestnuts roasting on an open fire. Boxers? Happy trail? Armpit hair? Yes, yes, and YES!
Same with Robert Pattison. Yes he helped perpetuate that fangsty Twilight series, but it also introduced us to ultra-hunk wolfboy Taylor Lautner and the twink-porn spin-off Twinklight—so we can’t completely begrudge Mr. Pattison, especially since he’s just a teensy bit gay! And now that we see how willing he is to strip down and go swimming, we like him all the more.
And last but not least there’s occasional drag queen and gay orgy attendee James Franco. He played Harvey’s gay lover in Milk and now he’s on film kissing another guy—himself. We kinda wanted to hear how he hits on a guy and for him to go into a full on make out, but classical music and a peck on the cheek works too… we guess.
Billy Herrington is a bisexual muscleman who worked in porn at the turn of the century. He still stripteases at gay clubs sometimes but otherwise the star has faded into obscurity everywhere EXCEPT FOR IN JAPAN. Japan loves the guy—like crazy extra-lucky happy fun schoolgirl LOVE him. Not only does the guy have his own Halloween action figure but for the past few years the Japanese video site Nico Nico Douga has hosted insane music video mashups from his films.
Herrington says he is flattered and humbled by his fans’ creativity but that’s probably because he had no other ways to describe how completely bonkers the videos actually are. Are you ready for seizure wrestling, butt bongos, S&M villains and a jock-strapped man-cycle fighting a steamroller? No. No you are not.
BILLY’S DREAMLAND – If you like spastic video game music, you’ll love this one. It has lots of bitch slapping, ball handling, and butt bongos while the wrestle in jockstraps and bikinis. Locker room horseplay has never been so crazy. And don’t forget to stay for the butt-smashing finale!
HATTENDO FIGHTING GAME – Oh! If only our Billy Herrington action figure would come to life and star in a weird fighting game with firetrucks, throat punching, military manhunts, explosions, and a villainous Asian leather queen. This game actually looks a lot like Muscle March except with horribly pixelated graphics. Warning: the video slows down into character select mode at 1:36 and also features baby faces spinning in place of men’s genitals.
BILLY FOR PRESIDENT! – If America ever elected a brain-damaged, auto-tuned ex-porn star for president his version of the national anthem might sound a lot like this. Billy takes the flexing in his wifebeater as the news ticker below features headlines like Vitory for Billy and song lyrics like “I Say Ass We Can…” and “Who can achieve most powerful pants?” We’d vote for you Billy, but only if we were sure you’d lose. No offense, but one inarticulate president is enough.
TOXIC BILLY – Brittany Spears’ music company probably didn’t authorize a CGI-version of Billy to sing Toxic but as one friend of ours said, “Sodomy was a lot more fun when it was illegal.” There’s something alluring about watching the computer-animated musclestud imitating Brittany’s every dance move while lip-synching in a white bikini. Is it weird that we almost find the animated Billy hotter than the real one? Don’t answer that—we love you, digi-Billy!
GAME/TV SHOW/MUSIC VIDEO – We can’t tell if this is the intro for a game, a TV show, a punk rock music video, or all 3. But it does feature Billy ripping some guy’s underwear from behind, bouncing baby faces, and a comic book look that makes us wanna play this thing, whatever the heck this is.
J-POP MY CHERRY – Although this isn’t our favorite video, it does feature some sensual shots of Herrington pumping iron, having his abs worshipped by some gym bunny, and naughtily sucking his finger at the end. Strangely hot considering that it’s basically just a music video.
K-POP JAM- The song in this video (“Oh!” by Girls’ Generation) has a kickin’ beat and a catchy choral hook that has made it our new Korean-pop jam! Plus the video probably reveals more plot about the ongoing S&M locker room wrestling flick than any of the other videos. It seems like the Asian S&M bully gets his army of bitches to start fights at the gym, but Billy’s boys ain’t having it! Plus if you like Billy, then you’ll love ONE-HUNDRED BILLIES!
Celebrity sex tapes are alright, but they reek of amateurishness. Their sound usually sucks, the lighting’s awful, and all the best body parts usually end up blurry and stupid looking. But not porn star sex tapes, no siree! As professionals used to fucking on camera, they know the importance of good sound, excellent lighting, and full visibility of sexy bits. That’s why we’re so boned about this sex tape between AJ Irons and David SF. There’s kissing, handjobs, face fucking and oh so much more! They’ll make you never want to go back to celebrity sex tapes ever again. Via
Do you like robots? You’re gonna learn to like them, bitch. Especially after you see this one pop a boner while breakdancing and starts spinning on his enormous cock. He’s auditioning for the Dutch version of So You Think You Can Dance and the judges like him, but do any of them have the balls to mention the elephant in the room—or should we say, the elephant in his pants? It’s pointing right at them and play a role in his most stunning move. Maybe they think his dancing actually sucks and what they really want is to see what else he can do with that thang.
We’ve already given youthe best dating advice we can think of for personal sites and even shown you some of the studs behind those sizzling online ads. But if you’re still striking out in the online dating world, you could always go on Craigslist’s “Missed Connections” section and try to contact that dark handsome stranger you saw yesterday in the park. Just y’know… make sure that they’re actually gay and not a crackhead before you try and reach them.
When Chinpoko asked we QueerClickers abouthaving sex with animals, he linked to a story about Canberra Raiders rugby player Joel Monaghan. Monaghan got drunk with a bunch of teammates and decided to play a prank on an absent team member by taking a picture of himself being fellated by the teammate’s dog. You probably “had to be there” to understand the hilarity.
Anyway, one of his trusty teammates must have e-mailed the photo or something because it eventually found its way onto Twitter and landed Monaghan in hot water. Animal activists cried rape but Monaghan’s agent Jim Banaghan said that his client meant it as a joke, not sexual abuse. Nonetheless, the Canberra Raiders CEO Don Furner opened an inquiry into the matter that forced Monaghan to leave the team in disgrace. In response, Monaghan’s agent issued the following statement:
“Joel can’t blame anyone but himself for an act of stupidity that will haunt him for the rest of his life.
Joel wants to make it clear that he was the one playing a prank on an absent teammate by simulating the act.
There are no words of explanation that can be offered because none can be appropriate.
Joel has to now face his family as well as fans and supporters with that shame and has already undergone counseling to help him cope with the consequences of what has happened.
It was a moment of abject stupidity brought about by too much drink and a complete lack of any thought process.
The fact that someone has sought to compound the situation further by the use of social media only adds to the trauma, but Joel accepts that it is his actions alone that are at fault.”
Wait… there are therapists in Australia that specialize in media fallout from bestiality sex pics? Wow, the Outback really does have everything. The Canberra Raiders CEO said, “[The dog sex] is something [Monaghan] will live with for the rest of his life… a big cross to bear for doing something stupid out on the drink. The perils of the media and social media today are a great example of why you shouldn’t do [something like this].”
Let that be a warning to all you kids thinking of making a sex tape with your housepets. We have a picture of their drunken canine tryst and our expert analysis of the entire thing on QCX where it belongs. Don’t act all decent… we know you wanna see it.
Meet Toban Nichols. He’s a friend and what we like to call a deconstructivist artist that’s based in Los Angeles. Yeah, it may be “too out there” for some of you, but we like it. Besides his wonderful taste in music, camp and art, we love how his brain works. Juxtaposing things we love (stuff like naked guys) with flowers and bright, colorful lego-like bricks and other delights. Case in point, his latest video creation taking old found porn footage and making it something else, Mysteries of Carom. (Carom is a type of billiard game).
Toban describes it as, “The video is meant as a contemplation of a specific sexual act that is difficult to view, or for some people hard to understand. Upon discovering the origin video, I found the subject matter complex and disturbing but also felt compelled to use the negative feelings I was having to create a work of art that is multi-layered, interesting and has a sense of humor and wonder about itself. The soundtrack is meant to provide context and assist the audience in the formation of a complex narrative and should bring about a feeling of child-like wonder, whimsy and surreal if not disgusted interest in the world we live in. The music is meant to be disparate and opposite of the source video. The comedic and curious stance the video takes is meant as an elevation of this type of subject matter to an artistic context.”
First off, we didn’t even know towel commercials existed. Second off, we’ve never had our hair look as good as this guy’s when exiting the shower. Third, we actually like holding strange men’s balls, rubbing them all over our faces, and sniffing them but this commercial makes it seem gross somehow. Like they basically took a low-hanging wrinkly pair of Truck Nuts, added pubes and then had this guy put a curly hair in his mouth. If they were at least still connected to a guy, this would have been the hottest towel commercial ever. As it is though, it’s still definitely the gayest.
Ever gotten an itch in public and you just gotta scratch it?? This guy certainly has, except it looks like less like an itch and more like something that’s gotta be taken care of at home—the horny little bugger. And what’s playing on his gizmo anyway? Probably something about perverts masturbating in public (God bless ’em). Hey you, put down that MP3 player and come play with this. We’ll scratch that itch for ya!
Via QCE
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows comes out in US theaters today, but remix artist Cassetteboy has edited together the trailer you really wanna see—one where the boy wizard comes onto older men, gets a blowjob from Mad Eye Moody, and fondles his 11-inch wand much to Hermione’s disgust. Cassetteboy already created mini-audiobooks forHarry Potter and The Black Leather Cunt and Harry Potter and The Underage Blowjob, but of course, we’ve been pointing out all the gay sex going down at Hogwarts for years now.
Sadly, we don’t mean fantasy-raped like Diesel Washington does, we mean actually raped. This last weekend, Kevin Burns (aka Kayden Daniels with Lollipop Twinks, Jizzaddiction, Boys Smoking, and Boys Pissing) got attacked by a rapist in South Florida. He got bashed in the head with a rock, had a knife held to his throat, had his clothes cut off, got stabbed multiple times in the back with a syringe and burned with a cigarette, all because some psychopathic freak hiding in the bushes wanted to terrorize a young pedestrian.
It happened Friday night at 9 in the evening on busy Dixie Highway and Northeast 19th Street in Fort Lauderdale. Kevin said a man walked up, asked for a cigarette, then bashed him in the head with a rock. Moments later, he was shoved into some woods, choked with his own shirt, his clothes were cut off with a knife and he was being stabbed in the back with, what appeared to be a syringe.
“I just felt like a shot you’d get at the hospital and it went 5 or 6 times into my back over and over again,” he explained to CBS 4’s Ted Scouten. “When he was getting ready to leave, when he was calling me faggot, he said ‘don’t move or I’ll inject.'”…
Standing at the scene of the attack, Kevin described it as “a place where part of my soul was ripped out.” “I don’t know how else to put it, it was scary. I thought I was dead.”
Sebastian Young, one of the original CockyBoys got stuck in prison for assault a while back, but the 26-year-old performer is out and harder and more inked than ever… and he wants REVENGE!!! REVENGE of course is the title of the CockyBoys upcoming release which will feature Sebastian aggressively fucking Trent Diesel this Thanksgiving (that’s one way to stuff a turkey). And Sebastian would like to personally invite QueerClick readers to check it out!
If you don’t know Sebastian, you’re in for a treat as CockyBoys describes him:
“There are bad boys and then there are BAD boys—and then there’s motha’ fuckin’ Sebastian Young. This tattooed thug will fuck you twice, call you his bitch, make you cook his dinner, and then toss you on your ass into the streets and make you thank him for the whole experience. Seriously, this tall straight muscle stud is the real deal and with a fat 9 inch cock there’s always gonna be a bit of pain mixed in with his pleasure… the good kind of pain.”
His scene partner Trent Diesel loved the rough fucking and Sebastian loved that he could do whatever he wanted to Trent. Ideally, Trent wants to get gangbanged, but until CockyBoys obliges Trent will gladly take on the one-man gangbang that is Sebastian. You can check out an interview with Sebastian and hear Trent rave about their scene. And when their Turkey Day fuck fest comes out, you can count on us to serve it up hot and fresh so you can gobble up every last sweat and cum-drenched inch—YOW!!!
