QColumn: A Gay In The Life: Aftershock!

Aftershock
By Steve Prince
“You promise you won’t say anything?” Troy asked while cutting a stern look in my direction.
“I promise,” I sighed. “Jeez, you act like I’m going to be shitting rainbow glitter as I walk through the door.”
Troy sighed and rubbed his forehead with this hand. “For the last time, I’m pretty sure they know I’m gay, but we’ve never really talked about it. Besides, I only see these people about once every year, so I just don’t feel like going through the whole story.” Troy’s face looked stern again, “and it’s none of their business who I’m rimming. Thank you very much.”
“Fine,” I said, “I’ll go along with it.”
Five minutes later we were in the car on our way to get Omar. I can’t believe I was going through with this. Here I am, going to a party on a Saturday night, with two of my best gay friends and I had to go into the closet? Really? I’m thirty. Troy’s thirty-two. Aren’t we a bit old for this?
I guess I knew what I was getting into. Troy told me all this before inviting me to this house party thrown by some of his old fraternity brothers. “They don’t know I’m gay,” he’d said. “I never told them. I don’t want to weird them out.”

Are they fucking blind? I thought. True, Troy wasn’t the most obvious gay guy, but you could tell he was different from the average straight guy. And I hate that he worried about “weirding” them out. It made me feel like some kind of freak, and I hadn’t felt that way in a long time.
“Hey kids!” Omar said as he hopped in the car. “Or perhaps I should say,” he lowered his voice, “what’s up bros?” He and I laughed.
“Now see?” Troy said, “You can’t do that.”
Omar tried to calm Troy, “I won’t say anything, promise.”
“Well,” Troy pointed at me, “don’t you laugh!”
“What,” I looked at him, “I can’t laugh?”
They both looked at me like I had asked a dumb question.
Okay, I have a gay laugh. Actually it’s more like a cackle. It runs in my family. Both of my Southern aunts cackle. Hell, even my father cackles. True, maybe it’s not the most masculine thing… but it’s me.
Gratefully, Omar changed the subject, as my thoughts swirled in my head. I really didn’t know why I was going to this party. I should have said no.
Another thing that bothered me was the guys acted like me “acting gay” was a bad thing; as if “acting straight” was a better way to be.
That’s bullshit in my book. It’s not that I try to act gay… okay well maybe sometimes. But mostly, I feel like I’ve become very comfortable with myself and how I am. As Troy cruised down Beverly Boulevard, conversations from the past popped back into my mind. Even though I liked the show Will & Grace, I remember hating one aspect of the show. Everyone kept trying to decide if I was a Jack or a Will. Ahh, I hated it. The worst part was that my friends didn’t even see how they were boxing me in as they discussed it in front of me. Maybe that’s why I get so irked when people try and say I’m either a top or a bottom. How about I just am… and we can leave it at that.
I sighed quietly in the passenger seat and glanced out the window. I really shouldn’t be getting so worked up about this. I could have chosen not to be here.
Troy turned off of Beverly onto a small street lined with trees and apartments that look like they were built in the 60’s.
As we parked and the three of us exited the car, I remained quiet. I was a bit scared to speak—I didn’t want to piss of Troy.
When we walked into the front door and a group of guys yelled, “HEEEY!” at the sight of Troy… I knew I was in trouble.
Why? Why did I go to a party with a bunch of ex-fraternity guys? I’m such a dumbass. As I scanned the room, it looked like I was at a Sean Cody ten-year reunion.
Jeeezus.
Thankfully, I found my go-to when I get nervous… the alcohol and food table. Omar followed me.
“Oh my god,” he whispered in my ear, “these guys are so hot!”
“Yeah, no shit,” I said flatly.
We gathered some food on plates and each grabbed a beer. Troy was already laughing with a group of fellas, and it looked like they were re-enacting some weird handshake or something. Omar and I found a corner and situated ourselves out of the way. I think Troy and I had both been planning on laying low tonight. We just chatted for a bit while drinking our beer.
Soon, the guys began telling embarrassing stories about one another. It was like porn. Seriously, these guys were talking about dumb things they did when they were naked, or with other girls, or… well, just imagine it and they were talking about it.
Wanting to leave the room for a bit, I made an excuse. “I gotta pee,” I said to Omar as I put down my plate.
“I’ll be here,” he said, his eyes searching the guys in the room. He looked like a hungry wolf in a sheep’s pasture.
I went to the bathroom and while I was in there someone knocked at the door.
“Occupied,” I said.
“Oh sorry bro,” the guys voice said. It felt weird to be called “bro”.
As I stepped out of the bathroom, I looked into the face of the guy waiting.
“Oh,” he said with a look of surprise, “Steve?”
I stood in the doorway, dumbfounded. Oh fuck. I had slept with one of Troy’s fraternity brothers.
“Hey,” I said awkwardly, “um…bro.” I couldn’t remember his name.
Without a word he took my hand and pulled me from the bathroom to a closed bedroom.
“What are you doing?” I asked as he shut the door and locked it. He smelled of alcohol. I was sure he was tipsy at least.
“I want to show you that I’ve learned a thing or two since I last saw you,” he said smiling.
And in one swift motion he dropped to his knees and began to unzip my pants.
I don’t think Troy’s gonna like this…
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Years after moving from Oklahoma, Steve Prince is still acclimating to the gay scene in Los Angeles—he’s a slow learner. By trial and error and a lot of sex, his mission is to make the uncomfortable, comfortable. Also it should be known that he is gayer than butt sex.
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Previously, on A Gay In The Life:
The Birds and The Birds
Lyin’, & Twinks, & Bears—Oh My!
Going Public
Christmas in July
Luck Be A Lady Tonight
I Left My Heart In Oklahoma
As Luck Would Have It
Shock & Awe
Blame It On Britney
The Unending Journey
Makin’ Copies
Bullets and Bracelets… and Lube
To Tell The Truth…
Stars Aren’t Blind
The Dark Knight
Come As You Are
A Date?
A Happy Ending
Better Than Nothing
A Man With A Slow Hand
Taking The Long Way
Everybody Knows
Wake Me Up, Before Ya Go-Go
Definition
The Best
The Upper Hand
Hit Me With Your Best Shot
2000-Date
Dick The Halls
The Queer Dear
A Night At The Museum
A Conversation
I’m Just A Girl Who Can’t Say No
Change The Way You Feel
Kissing A Fool
Leo The Lamb
The Elephant In The Room
Zuckerman’s Famous Pig
A Birthday Surprise
The Sleepover-er
SP Phone Home
Out of the Frying Pan and into the Closet
What If…
Just Beat It
Intimate Portrait
Intimate Portrait (Part Deux)
Intimate Portrait (Part Trois)
State of Mind
The Age of Disbelief
A Man For All Seasons
Summer Lovin’
A-Men
The Urge
Gettin’ It Done
Here You Cum Again
Eye Of The Beholder
The Present
A Minute’s Pause
Brotherly Love
Ladies Who Lunch
Here Cums The Rain Again
Dinner For Two
Blow by Blow
Commando
Cum As You Are?