I’m a big fan of Logan McCree and I’m wondering if anyone knows how you tattoo something like a cock? I’m curious because it changes sizes often. Do you have to stay hard the entire time the tattoo needle’s going or do you get it when flaccid? Do any of you guys know how this is done?
He’s not exactly asking for advice but maybe one of our tattoo-artist or science-buff QClickers can better explain the process of dick-tattooing. It’s our understanding that a dick does not have to stay hard, but we’re unsure about the exact method, intensity of pain (especially on the glans) or the healing process. So any artistic and inked types, please share your experiences and advice in the QComments section!
We get questions like this every now and then, but this one comes from a younger member of our QCommunity, Fuzzy at QueerClique:
Right so… My name is Jake. I’m 19 and I live in Ireland. I have a little problem and would like some advice!
I have known that I am gay since I was 13 but I have acted straight since then. I have never had a girlfriend. One of the guys in my class (who we all knew was gay from the first day that we met) has come out to us. He is one of my good friends and I think he knows that I am gay. But most of the time I cant stand to be around him because he annoys the hell out of me! I also think other people are starting to suspect me. Nothing has happened between us…yet!
Last November we were at one of my friend’s birthdays and I was driving us home. About 5 minuets from his house, he starts asking me if I like this girl. Then out of the blue he asks me if I would ever have sex with a guy! My reply was “It depends.”
A few months later in January, it was his birthday. A group of us went bowling and back to his house afterwards. As a group we watched DVDs and danced to music. It turned out that I was the only one spending the night at his house. After everyone had left it was just the 2 of us. You could nearly cut the sexual tension with a knife. After about 2 hours of playing on the Wii we decided to go to bed. I was so close to walking into his bedroom while he was getting changed but I didn’t.
Just as I got into bed he walked into my room and said “Can I ask you something?” I said sure. Then he said “Nevermind, it’s embarrassing,” and got up and walked out. Since then I have often visualized us doing various things to each other and wondered what would have happened if I had asked him “What’s embarrassing?”
So my question to you all is what do I do now? Any advice will be considered. I am confused and I need help!
Thanks for reading.
Young attraction and crushes can be awkward, especially when you find yourself paired up with an unlikely lover. What should our Irish friend do? Should he hit on his openly gay (but annoying) pal or should he set his sites elsewhere? If he decides to make a move, what’s the best way to begin? And if he doesn’t, what should he do next? Please share your experiences and advice in the QComments section or on Fuzzy’s blog.
I’m 40 and have been dating a 35-year-old for almost a year. We’re exclusive and although we don’t live together things have been going very well generally and I wouldn’t be against us turning into Ozzie and Harriet at some point. But a recent development has caught me by surprise.
One night while staying over at my place, I caught him masturbating to a lesbian wrestling site. It’s a small place and I wasn’t spying; I just looked into the study on my way to the kitchen and he had his back to me while scrolling through some pages of naked women fighting. He was totally jerking-off. Not a biggie—that’s what the computer’s there for. I didn’t interrupt because I didn’t want to embarrass him, but I did ask him about it at breakfast the next morning.
“What was that about?” I asked. “Are you bisexual?” “I dunno,” he said. He used to date women back when he was closeted (that’s how he always puts it: his “heterosexual phase.” “I was a young economics major and didn’t know any better, ha ha”). I shrugged it off and asked for the jam when he asked, “What if I were bisexual?” “I’m all the woman you need,” I said. “What if I said I wanted to have sex with a woman?” he asked. “I’d probably call an exorcist,” I said. But he wasn’t joking…
“Are you serious?” I asked. Then he started talking about how he’s been jerking off thinking about women more often these days, how there’s a few at his gym that he finds attractive, and how he’s wondering if he should explore it. Well, I got positively side-swiped. Here’s the deal: I know that sexuality’s a fluid thing (the Kinsey scale and all that), but he’s never even mentioned in the slightest that he’s anything other than gay; at least since I met him.
“How important is to you?” I asked him, and he said he didn’t know, but that he was curious. I told him I’d get back to him and so here I am. We’re not in an open relationship so I’m not really keen on letting him go out and fool around with some random woman. He asked me how I’d feel about a woman in our bed as part of a threesome and I said, “I’d feel sorry for that woman—it’d be the gayest sex she’s ever had.”
I was kidding of course. I’m about as interested in fooling around with a woman as I am in drawing unicorns on my kneecaps (which is to say, not at all). I’m not one of those “women are icky” gays, I’m just a three-dollar bill. But what should I do about my burgeoning bisexual beau? I really don’t want to let some skank have my guy, but I don’t want to lose him either and I think he’s gotta scratch that itch.
Sex between us has been pretty good—at least two or three times a week with lots of physical affection and cuddling, so I don’t think it’s that. But I’m very possessive and it would really break my heart if he slept with someone else—I can’t help it… I’m an old-fashioned romantic. I’ve already told him all this of course, but how to proceed? Should I be worried?
Please help me, QC darlings. Like Obi Wan Kenobi, you are my only hope. All my brunch buddies told me to get a cat, take a quaalude, and call it a day—what bitches!
Welly, well… what a conundrum! On the one hand, it’s great that these guys are so open with each other that they can discuss their feelings honestly, but it seems like their openness has a limit. Should our advice seeker let his boyfriend explore his bisexuality even though it will break his heart? Can he say no without making his boyfriend unhappy? Is this the beginning of the end or the start of something weird and wonderful? Please share your experiences and advice in the QComments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I’m a 25-year-old guy who works at an industrial print shop in Wyoming. I’ve been working in print for 4 years and for the whole part I’m good at it, I enjoy what I do, and I like my place of work. It’s just that lately I’ve been hearing a lot from opinionated co-workers who don’t like gays very much. They say things like “it’s unnatural,” “that’s so gay,” and “I think we should just put ’em on one big island.” I know not all of them feel like that, but it just seems like the ones who do are more vocal. And the ones who don’t would rather keep quiet than cause waves. Sadly, I’m one of those quiet people.
I’ve never made an issue of my sexuality at work (I prefer to keep my work life and personal life separate) so I definitely don’t want to start now. I’d hate for me to come out to these guys just to shut them up, but I’m getting tired of hearing them speak without saying anything. How can I speak up without outing myself? Should I be afraid of retaliation or name-calling if I do stand up to them? Should I tell my boss? Please help.
Some of his co-workers sound like real boneheads. We understand work can be a touchy place for sexual issues, but he shouldn’t have to listen to such degrading talk. After all, others might not tolerate it if they were talking that way about blacks, Jews, or women. So what do you think, QC readers? How can our young worker make his co-workers more aware of their ignorance without making himself a target? Is there a way he can get his say while covering his ass if they decide to give him trouble? Please share your experiences and advice in the QComments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I recently started dating a special guy. We’re both about 30 and he’s handsome, considerate, cute, intelligent, a good kisser and well-hung—excellent! He’s been really great and has introduced me to lots of his friends, which has been awesome… they’re all so creative, intelligent, engaging and handsome. Here’s the problem though, one of his friends is definitely into me. His friend is a nice and very handsome guy who lives in New York and if I hadn’t just started dating his buddy, he’s the sort of guy I’d totally jump into the sack with. So I’m not sure what to do.
I wanna give the guy I’m dating a fair chance and be honest with him, but I don’t know how to handle his friend. The last time I saw this friend, he gave me an extra long hug and made sure our cheeks were touching. He kisses me hello and goodbye and says things like “You’re so adorable.” He’s a nice, sexy guy and he invited me to go out and have drinks with him in my upcoming visit to the city, but I’m worried that if we do that he’ll try something.
I’m a grown man and I don’t want to get my new beau involved; this is between me and his friend. But I’m also unsure what to say or do about his friend that won’t make a big deal out of this. Truth is, his friend and I could benefit from each other’s friendship and we only see each other sometimes, so how should I handle this? Should I do everything possible to distance myself from his pal (that is, not ever call him and avoid him in public)? Should I say something to his pal, and if so, what? I’ve gotten in trouble in the past from not keeping my hands to myself and I don’t want to ruin my chances with my fella just because of my horniness or his tempting friend.
Any advice would help.
Why is it that as soon as you start dating someone hot guys start coming out of the woodworks? This is an ages old problem, but what’s the best way to handle a randy friend? In our opinion, this guy should just ignore the pal’s advances, make clear that he’s not interested, and then distance himself, but that’s just us. What do you think, QC readers? Is there a better way to handle this without making a too big deal about it? Please share your experiences and advice in the QComments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I don’t know how to ask this without sounding like a prude or a bible-beater, but does anyone date anymore? It seems like all gay guys (myself included) like jumping into the sack almost immediately, no matter if the date’s going well or not. That’s all good and well for a quickie, but it’s gotten to a point where it feels weird NOT to sleep with a guy on the first date; even though sleeping with guys too quickly has undoubtedly ruined long-term prospects with men I’ve liked once or twice.
Here’s an example. I met a guy online. He was great—very funny, nice, smart, handsome, and stylish. We went on a great date and had awesome conversation. We kissed before going out for coffee. After coffee, we went back to his place and fooled around; it was nice. The second time we got together we fucked and both came about four times apiece. Now, things have changed between us… I don’t know how, but they have. I get the feeling he thinks I’m only interested in sex, even though I actually wanted to date the guy. Yeah he’s busy, but he barely even calls and never makes plans, with even though he’s mentioned on the phone going out with other friends. I feel jealous and want him to spend time with me—after all, it said on his profile that he wanted to date. I can’t help but feel if I had taken my time that we might still be having great conversation and hanging out… oh well.
When I ask friends about this, they’re of two minds. One group says that you should sleep with anyone you’re attracted to and if it’s meant to be, it’ll work out. The other says you should only sleep with guys that you feel a genuine connection with over the span of several dates. That’s OK, but I guess it leaves me feeling like a bit of a tease. I mean, I obviously want to sleep with men I choose to date and I feel like if I string them along with kisses and a gradual baseball game of first base, second base, etc. that they’ll get bored, think I’m a disinterested prude or playing games and leave. I’m not trying to play games, I just dislike how sex seems to automatically change everything between people and I’d rather get to know a guy and appreciate him for him rather than just stick around for the possibility of getting in their pants. A lot of guys seem to be able to fuck immediately and stay around for personalities and intimacy as an after thought, but I’m not so sure I’m built like that.
So I guess I have a few questions: First, where can I find guys who actually date? Are there any readers on this blog who don’t jump into the sack too quickly? If so, (number two) how do you do it? Do you plan out how fast you’ll go with a guy (especially when you really want them)? Three, am I doing anything else wrong? I mean, I like sex as much as the next guy, but I really want a boyfriend… or at least someone I can date and spend time with. Am I going about this all wrong? I’m probably over-thinking it. Whatever happened to intuition, romance, and taking your time? Am I being naive or old-fashioned? If feels confusing sometimes.
I’d appreciate any advice and feedback from guys more like myself.
Thanks.
We’re of two minds about this letter as well. First, we empathize with wanting to find true love with that special someone, but we obviously understand the power and drive of sexual desire. So how can our young lover tame his sexual beast without killing all spontaneity? Is there a place (other than church) where easy-going and sociable gay men meet? Is there a way to convey to someone that you’re interested but don’t want to move too fast? Does wanting to go slow make you a prude or a game player? So many questions… please share your experiences and advice in the QComments section. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I’m a guy in his mid-20’s who have just came out less than a year ago. I’m currently with my first boyfriend for 6 months and my only sexual experiences are with him. I’ve always been the bottom because he’s a top. He has only tried bottoming once in his life and according to him, it hurts and he bled the first time which was a couple of years back.
We have always discussed about me topping him and although he’s reluctant at first, he said he’s willing to try again. The problem is, everytime I try to penetrate him, I go soft. I can have boner during foreplay, blow job and even when he’s fucking me. I just don’t understand why I go limp as I am very much in love/interested with him.
According to my boyfriend, he said I was too nervous but we have been trying for at least 5 times, am I still nervous? He has been doing all he can to get me hard again but I was just not able to maintain it until the crucial penetration moment. There was a time, he was fucking me, while I have a raging hard on, he pulls out and puts on a condom on me. He laid down and ask me to penetrate him but I go limp AGAIN!
I really wanted to top him as my sexual urges tells me, but I’m not able to. It’s frustrating, not only because I can’t fuck but also because I’m disappointing my boyfriend. I’ve always thought topping is easy as it’s natural for a guy to fuck and bottoming was hard as it’s painful. But it appears bottoming was much easier because you dont have to deal with the frustration of not being to get hard and fuck.
I’m not on any medication and do not have any significant health problems. Can anyone tell me what’s going on and what I can do about it? I would prefer not to take drugs (i.e. viagra).
Thanks.
We’ve had at least one other advice-seekerwho had trouble topping his lover. That time, most readers advised him to get a cockring, but only one advised him to take a closer look at his personal anxieties. It sounds like today’s advice seeker has more of a psychological issue rather than physical one, so what’s to be done? Going limp can compound itself if it becomes all a guy thinks about. But trying not to think about it is like saying, “Don’t think about pink elephants.” So what’s a guy to do?! How can our advice-seeker unite this problematic knot and end up on top? Please share your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
“How do I behave in the locker room (without missing out on gym cock!)?
I work out in the gym quite often. And I gotta be honest—I love the changing room and showers afterwards. The guys getting naked, wet, and pumped up really turn me on!
But I don’t know how to behave properly. At the moment I’m trying to look as if I don’t care. But I think with this behavior I’m missing out on the possible action that others always tell me about.
The question: how do I behave best in the locker room without being annoying and without missing out? Is it OK to smile to a guy next to you in the shower? Others tell me about jerking off in the shower to get attention, but hey, that’s like crazy isn’t it? And what about the sauna? I’m lost.
QueerClick, tell me how to behave and still get gym-cock 😉
Best from Berlin
YUPPYUPPY”
We’ve got a gym bunny who’s hungry for some carrots and holes! But how can he get his fill without having his tail bitten off? (OK, we’ll drop the metaphor) He wants to cruise some hot gym cock, but also wants to avoid being a pest, a creep, or getting kicked out. So we need some tips on gym cruising 101. Any experienced gym bunnies in the house? Help out a fellow friend by sharing your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
Long story short: bottoming hurts and I usually end up biting the pillow and moaning and convulsing from the painful intensity of it instead of the pleasure. I mean, I like the physical closeness and intimacy of sex and it pleases me to give my partner pleasure. But for me, there’s nothing really erotic about having my ass pummeled. I know of some guys who LOVE bottoming. I’m always amazed at porn stars and guys on XTube who can stay hard while getting fucked. And I go cross-eyed when I hear of guys who actually cum while getting fucked—what?!!
I’m 30 and have been getting fucked for almost a decade now, but I guess I must be doing it wrong. As I age, I’m beginning to feel like I’m a real crummy bottom. I just kinda let the guy violate my ass while gritting my teeth. I’m not sensuous or in any sort of control or ecstasy. Meanwhile, I’ve fucked a few bottoms who are awesome and whenever I ask “How do you do it?” They always smile and act like their skill is some big tantric secret that they can’t articulate.
Please help me. I wanna learn how to be a more capable and sensual bottom and I’m willing to take instruction, change my attitude, and put in the practice. But I feel like I need simple, easy to understand notes about how to insert the cock without feeling too much pain, how to get their cock to stimulate my prostate, and how to ride it for a long time without getting tired of the nonstop hurt. I feel cut off from an entire aspect of my pleasure as it is. I want to enjoy having sex with the men that I love as much as they do. I’d love to be one of those guys who can stay hard, derive pleasure, and even cum from getting fucked.
Thanks
Bottoming can be a tricky business for even the most seasoned porn star. And it seems that everyone has their own bag of tricks when it comes to turning it out and spreading their legs open wide for the right fuckstud. It sounds like our advice seeker wants to be having a lot more fun, so what’s to be done? Should he practice with toys? Read a book? Masturbate more often? Find the right-sized dick? Practice breathing? We need you awesome bottoms to help this blossoming butt become all that he can be! Please share your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I love your website and I usually look at it along with some other gay porn sites I like to jerk off before bed every night. I have recently joined a gay personals site meant for hooking up and I now have men I can sleep with in any major US city I visit. I sleep with gay friends that I’ve had for years, I sleep with strangers I meet off the web, I am currently sleeping with about 3 different men in the city where I live on a regular basis.
I grew up in a real strict religious household that taught me that gay love is evil. I have also always been in long-term monogamous relationships for most of my life. It’s just that I found that monogamy might not be right for me because I was always thinking about sleeping with other people. And now the number of men I have slept with over my entire life has gotta be getting up to the hundreds. A.D.I.D.A.S.—All Day I Dream About Sex. When I go to bars, parties, and the grocery store, I totally scope out all the guys and think about all the horribly wonderful things I want to do to them. I’ve even slept with guys I’m not totally attracted to because just because they’re sweet or nice.
I know there’s nothing wrong with a healthy sex drive, but sometimes I wonder if I have a problem. I mean, I’ve held down a full-time job for a long time and I have great relationships with my friends and family. I can also meet gay guys and not want to sleep with them. I always play safe and I’m up front with the men I’m seeing that I’m also sleeping with others, but sometimes I wonder when enough is enough. I was abused as a kid and have never been very confident. I think I sometimes sleep with gay guys I meet instead of just relaxing and being myself and actually getting to know them. And while I love the sex, I’m worried it might prevent me from meeting someone I can spend my life with. Or maybe not…there are guys in open relationships who fuck around and still love each other. I dunno. But am I a sex addict?
From everything I’ve read, I don’t think I’m as bad as some other guys who cheat on their lovers and fuck themselves out of a career and catch diseases because they just can’t keep their pants on. But at the same time, my sexual desire does feel a bit compulsive. I would rather be fucking than not and I’m always on the prowl, it seems. But does that make me an addict or just a guy with a healthy sex drive? Should I find a group or slow myself down?
There’s nothing wrong with a healthy sex-drive. But at the same time, if this fella’s writing into Ask QC, he must find something a bit off with the way he’s conducting himself. Sex addiction can be complicated, there are often lots of reasons people feel compelled to have sex and some people even think “sexual addiction” is just a label to stigmatize sexual liberation. We also have gay friends who have hooked up with literally hundreds of guys, but they’re at least slutty, if not “addickted.” So what do you think? Has our writer got a problem or is he just feeling weird about his newfound sexual freedom? Should he join a group and if he does, what sorts of questions might he ask himself to figure out if he is or isn’t? Please share your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I am 18 years old and I am afraid that I might have oral herpes! Why I say I think is because I just found tiny bumps at the end of my lips and when I looked up pictures and symptom of this I got scared!
When I looked at pictures it kinda looked like that but I don’t have the symptom. I am still worried about it and plan to go to the health clinic for the first time to get an STD/HIV test and to see if this could be oral herpes that I have. I am currently in a relationship
with my boyfriend of more than a year and I love him dearly and would be devastated if I lose him.
The only way I could have gotten this was from the two guys I had slept with. They didn’t have any bumps and they both said they were clean. The only reason I did this is because we were going through some problems and let my penis head think on its
own.
I am really scared at this point and pray to god it it’s nothing. What do you think I should do? Should I worry? Should I tell?
A few things strike us about this reader’s letter. First off, the web’s a horrible place to diagnose one’s self. Once when we had an ingrown hair, the web told us that we had skin cancer. Second, herpes is mega-contagious and about 1 in 2 people has it—your grandma can give you the herp just by kissing you on the cheek. That being said, no one likes cold sores, especially on your genitals. Lastly, our own QColumnist slept around on his boyfriend recently and got differing opinions on whether or not to tell. But we’ll stop there and let our readers weigh in. What should he do about bumps and his boy? Please share your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I I hope you can help me out. I am 23 and have only been with a few guys and somehow I caught HPV. None of the guys had any warts or bumps or anything and when I asked if they were clean they all said yes. Last week, I thought I was getting a hemorrhoid (I’m a little beefy), but when I went to the doctor he said, “That’s not a hemorrhoid. That’s an anal wart!”
I feel so disgusting and scared. I don’t know who gave them to me or what I can do about them. I don’t have health insurance and I can’t afford to have them treated. I work have a low-paying job and I heard some treatments can cost $300 or more (and I don’t want to ask my family, they do not even know I am gay). Also, I just started dating a really great guy and I’m afraid that I may have given HPV to him. We have not had sex, but he did rim me before I got the wart, so I’m afraid he’ll get them too (maybe even on his face). Also, I don’t want him to leave me, but I hear that one of my old partners could have given me the disease, so do I need to contact everyone I’ve slept with?
Please help me. I have no one very close that I can discuss these issues with.
Sometimes we just wanna reach out and give our letter writers a hug. This guy is definitely one of those. Seems like he’s got a lot on his plate. From what we know, HPV isn’t the end of the world (it’s highly communicable, but treatable), but he still needs several types of advice. First, how can he find affordable treatment? Second, how should he go about telling his current lover about his medical condition? Lastly, should he tell his past partners as well, or is that overkill? Please share your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I have been dating my bofriend for almost 3 years. He is 22 and I am 31. I love him dearly and I think he loves me too. But we’ve had many problems in the past, some of them like him telling lies and not admitting it even when I’ve got all the facts.
First, he created a profile on a site saying that he was single. When I asked him about it, he said no. I asked him several times and the answer was still no. When I showed him the site, he got angry. He said he didn’t want to see me again and then began to cry and bang his head against the wall!!! I decided to just forget about it.
Then a few months ago, he added one of my student on his profile. Now my student doesn’t know him personally. But when my boyfriend and I go for walks I often see my students in town. My boyfriend always teases me about them and always
wants to know their names. When I came to know about him and this student in particular, I didn’t tell him anything.
But one day when my boyfriend was with me, we met that particular student. My boyfriend just walked away and didn’t meet the student. Afterwards my boyfriend started asking me lots of questions about him, pretending as if he didnt know a thing about him!!! I got angry and phoned the student and he told me that he knew my boyfriend. But even to today my boyfriend never admitted even knowing the guy.
A few days back, I discovered he added another student, Tom. My boyfriend knew Tom was my student and Tom came and told me about it. When i asked my boyfriend, he said he didn’t add any student named Tom. I asked him several times and the answer was still “no,” Then he said that he adds lots of people and that maybe he added him, but didn’t know he was my student. Now, I know for sure that he knew the guy was my student because he always used to tease me about him, asking me how he is.
Please advise me what to do. I know that my boyfriend will never tell the truth. For him, I am the one who is accusing him of something he never did. It’s been four days and he hasn’t even called or SMS. I’ve heard nothing from him. And I’m sure he is lying and I know he will never admit it, just like in the past. Please help. Thanks.
We certainly have our own opinion about what this gent should do about his lying boyfriend (hint: it rhymes with “dump him”), but it seems like he genuinely loves his guy, so we’re wondering… is it possible to reform a liar? Could it be that his boyfriend is lying for a certain reason that our advice seeker could clear up? Is there a way he could end up having the same boyfriend, but without all the games? Please share your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I have a question about how to have an effective bar hookup! I am a bottom and when I know I’m going to have sex with a gentleman caller, I always make sure to wash my booty clean inside and out!
The thing is, if I’m hooking up with a guy from the bar, I dont have the proper tools with me or maybe even a private place in which to “evacuate the dancefloor” as Cascada would put it. If I have the feeling I might get lucky I’ll do it beforehand, but often the contents have shifted during the flight and im not rady to go anymore…
I see guys leaving together, sometimes not even making it to each others’ homes… and I dont know how they’re doing it! I cant imagine they all are just getting down and very “dirty.” Is there a secret I should know about? or should I just accept that I cant get off after lights on?
Yours in Christ,
Bar Bottom
Um… can we just say how much we love that a letter about anal douching before drunken buttsex ends in “Yours In Christ”? That aside, it seems like Bar Bottom has the wrong idea about a few things. Bottoms we’ve hooked-up with occasionally visit the bathroom for a little “dance floor evacuation” before sex. And we’ve also had bar hookups that don’t end in anal sex. But tell us, fellow bar bottoms: what’s your secret when you need to “evacuate the dance floor” in a hurry? Is it always possible to be prepared for the unexpected? Please share your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I’m a virgin (sorta) and need help regarding what should I do to make my ass loose.
I’ve been on dates with tops but have disappointed them due to the pain—when I bottom, it feels like my ass is tearing up and I feel a burning sensation when applying lube (not sure if that’s normal).
Thanks,
JT
Sounds like our novice bottom’s having a rocky ride. While we’re not so sure about why one would feel a burning sensation while applying lube (hemorrhoid perhaps?), we’re sure there are other things JT might do to help make bottoming more go more smoothly. How can he loosen himself up beforehand and reduce the pain during sex and really begin to enjoy all that bottoming has to offer? Please share your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
I got HIV when I was 23 and I’m never sure when to tell someone I wanna sleep with that I’m positive—both online and in person.
I don’t have my HIV status listed on my personal profiles, but I’ll be honest about it if someone asks. I do this so that someone will get to know me first before excluding me. After all, I’m more than just HIV-positive; I’m also cool, friendly and funny. The problem is that not all guys ask and I’m never sure when to bring it up, though I’m pretty sure it’s not in the bedroom.
My friends all disagree about when the right time to tell someone is. Some even say that you don’t have to tell a guy at all as long as you’re only doing low-risk sexual activities. But I don’t feel at all comfortable with that. Am I being too cautious?
Do I need to put it out there first thing when meeting a guy or is it OK to wait? I don’t want to be sneaky or a liar, but I also want a guy to like me for me and not be afraid.
Thanks,
Oliver
Anyone who’s HIV-positive knows that disclosing your status can be like coming out all over again. But Oliver’s right, every guy seems to have different guidelines about when to tell someone. We agree that honesty’s the best policy, but when’s the best time to speak up? Please share your advice and experiences in the QComments. Have a question for QC? Send ’em to[email protected]and we’ll do our best to solve your problems!
